Princess Changle gradually became aware of her surroundings. At first, her consciousness was shrouded in darkness. She could not perceive any light or sound and even not sense her own body.
Princess Changle was overwhelmed with panic and helplessness, as she was just a 22-year-old girl. The worst part was that she couldnt even cry or have a hysterical outburst to release her emotions. Her mind was consumed with boundless anxiety and fear, making her unable to calm down. No one could see the turmoil that raged inside her as she appeared normal with her eyes closed.
Princess Changle was unsure of the passage of time, but she could faintly hear voices. She recognized her parents voices and the voices of many others. She longed to open her eyes but found herself unable to do so. The frustration of being unable to regain her sight added to her distress.
She recalled the experience of ghosts pressing down on her bed when she was a child. She was fully awake but found herself completely immobile, no matter how much effort she exerted. Her closed eyelids felt as heavy as a massive boulder rendering her unable to open them. It was a distressing and helpless feeling for her, just like her childhood memories of encountering ghosts.
Gradually, Princess Changle began to hear the voices around her more frequently. After her mother held her hand and wept for some time, she finally realized that she had fallen into a coma and was unable to wake up.
Despite her efforts to regain consciousness and move her body, Princess Changle remained paralyzed. The voices around her grew more distinct, though they still came and went in waves, sometimes clear and other times muffled.
As time passed, Princess Changle began to perceive a faint sensation in her body. It was a subtle feeling, but it was enough for her to realize that she was lying down. She could feel the texture of the bed beneath her and the softness of the pillows under her head. Occasionally, she would also experience the taste of food when she was fed.
Thats so bitter was it medicine? she thought, but she couldnt bring herself to spit it out. In the past, her mother would always use sugar to coax her into situations like this.
Princess Changle tried to convince herself that she had taken a lot of medicine. Even though it tasted incredibly bitter, she didnt feel any discomfort in her heart. Her father had once advised her that taking medicine was the key to healing. So, despite the bitterness, she believed that she would eventually recover if she took her medicine diligently.
Princess Changles consciousness was hazy, and she couldnt recall how many times she had taken the medicine. Unfortunately, it wasnt working at all. She made numerous attempts to open her eyes, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldnt seem to wake up. It was as if her consciousness was trapped in a cage, unable to break free.
As time passed, Princess Changle began to notice that she could sense other sensations in her body. During her baths, she could faintly feel the touch of her maid servants as they cleaned her. But there was one realization that shattered her spirit. She had lost control of her bladder and bowel movements. She could feel the discomfort of soiling herself and the shame that came with it. It was a constant reminder of her helplessness and dependence on others, and it filled her with despair.
Despite her maidservants responsible care, Princess Changle still felt deeply distressed by the loss of her bodily control. The loss of her dignity was overwhelming, and she understood that it was something that could shatter a persons spirit. She was aware that some people, unable to bear the destruction of their dignity, chose to end their lives before their natural time.
As a young Princess, she was at a stage in life where her self-esteem was extremely high. As she was only 22, she considered her dignity to be more important than life itself.
She tried many times to control her body, but she couldnt. Every excretion was an extreme destruction of self-esteem for Princess Changle. She couldnt even save her dignity by committing suicide.
No one would care about the turbulent waves in a vegetative persons heart. No matter how responsible the female officer was, she would not give Princess Changle any psychological support after cleaning up.
Princess Changle felt that death would be preferable to endure such a state of constant degradation. Though she could not resist the torturous cleaning process, she wished for the ability to numb herself from the painful experience. To her, this repeated destruction of her dignity felt like a form of torture. Each time the female officer finished cleaning her, Princess Changle was left on the brink of an emotional breakdown.
Every day, Princess Changle was unsure of how long she would have to endure such emotionally draining experiences. There was no one to comfort her, not even her own parents, who only cried to her about their own thoughts and feelings. She felt that she was like a piece of wood, not like a real person. Princess Changle faces such torture every day.
For Princess Changle, the tears shed by her parents aside her bed were no different from crying at her grave.
At this moment, Princess Changle felt as if her palm was being held by another rough hand. The heat in this palm made her slightly stunned, and an unusually gentle voice of a young man rang in her ears.
Let me introduce myself, my name is Su Li, and I am your husband!