Chen Feng never dreamed that Shen Lin would pull this stunt, so much so that he was stunned for quite a while before he reacted and withdrew his hand.
At this moment, he was truly overwhelmed with a mix of emotions.
Back then, Shen Lin was indeed quite proactive, but at most, it was inviting him and actively contacting him, never so direct or straightforward as now, and definitely never taking such direct action.
They had been apart for over half a year, and it felt like she had really changed a lot.
In fact, Chen Feng had changed even more than she had.
This perfectly matched the saying—things have changed and so have people; all is lost.
Now trying to reconcile, how could that possibly happen?
"Shen Lin, you should understand in your heart, I am no longer who I was, and neither are you. We cannot go back to the past. Plus, just last night, I reached an agreement with your family; we’re squared. If you think one million isn’t enough, I can appropriately increase it for you."
Chen Feng’s words were somewhat deliberately provoking.
However, Shen Lin was not angry at all, instead she just gently closed her eyes and sighed: "From the beginning, I never wanted to take your money, let alone any compensation for lost youth. You should know, the reason I chose you back then wasn’t because you had money. I was attracted to you mainly because I felt moved by you, it’s just that simple, even if you didn’t have money, a house, or a great job then.
Sometimes I think it’s incredible, considering my conditions were pretty good, how did I end up liking you out of the blue. But that’s fate, I don’t regret my choice back then, I only regret agreeing to divorce you so easily. It was me who single-handedly destroyed my own happiness. But you were also the executioner, who cut off our marriage."
If Shen Lin were to speak harshly, even make a scene crying, things would be easier; Chen Feng would just walk away, avoiding meeting her as much as possible. After all, she didn’t know where he lived at the moment.
But now she spoke so calmly, which made him think of the loving and happy days they shared, of her determination to marry him despite her parents’ objections. No matter how much Chen Feng hardened his heart, he couldn’t just walk away.
Chen Feng could only stand anxiously by the bed, not knowing what to say.
"I know you still have feelings for me, otherwise you wouldn’t have rushed in to save me early in the morning this time. Don’t deny it, we’ve been together for five or six years, even though the last few months weren’t smooth, but it can’t erase the happiness and warmth from all those everyday moments before.
Moreover, we actually don’t have any irreconcilable differences or wrongs between us. Before we divorced, neither of us did anything to betray one another. The foundation of our relationship is still there. We just ended up divorcing because of our cold war, lack of communication, coupled with our pride getting in the way."
We’ve been apart for so long now, we should both be aware of where the problem lies. The main reason I was angry and disappointed with you back then, as you know yourself, was because your work wasn’t going well, you were constantly downtrodden, wallowing in self-pity. If you had pulled yourself together, faced challenges positively, like you are now, how could I have been angry and disappointed with you?"
I was wrong too; back then I should have given you more comfort and encouragement, but I didn’t, instead always blaming you, adding insult to injury. Surely that disappointed and angered you too. The result was a prolonged cold war, leading to the end of our marriage. We both bear the responsibility."
Shen Lin analyzed the situation quite thoroughly, in a failed marriage, usually both parties hold some responsibility; it’s impossible for it to be entirely one side’s fault, the difference lies in the proportion of responsibility each bears.
Chen Feng also sighed, saying: "You’re right. Although you had your faults back then, more of the blame was on me. My work wasn’t going well, I couldn’t handle the blow of failure, which directly affected the care and concern I showed you emotionally in life, thus drawing your complaints.
At the time, I really needed your comfort and encouragement; yet you kept complaining about me, saying I was incompetent, that I couldn’t be helped, naturally making me feel hurt, doubting our relationship, and starting a cold war against you."
Shen Lin quickly said: "I know I was over the line back then, very cruel to you. But my intention wasn’t to hurt you, it was to motivate and encourage you to pull yourself together, like hoping that unyielding iron would become steel, not to knock you down."
Chen Feng smiled with a hint of bitterness: "You did motivate me back then, but you also knocked me down; you just didn’t encourage me."
"I don’t know why I was like that back then, I..."
Shen Lin tried to explain, but Chen Feng interrupted her with a wave of his hand: "Enough. This topic has been discussed thoroughly. We’ve been divorced for more than half a year. Even if I held resentment toward you in my heart before, now I don’t. So, discussing this any further serves no purpose. We can’t go back."
Shen Lin’s eyes blinked at his words, tears glistening in her eyes, her voice choked with emotion: "You’re really so heartless? You truly won’t give us another chance? You don’t want to save the love we’ve built over so many years? We were a happy couple, and we can always be a happy couple."