In the first two years after getting married, she also tried her best to love him. She couldn’t accept a loveless marriage herself, but this marriage came so suddenly that she couldn’t refuse, so she could only exert all her efforts to love him wholeheartedly.
She found all his good qualities, persuading herself one by one: such an outstanding man is worth loving; during the times when he was at work, she imprinted his image as the only figure in her mind, striving to long for him, imagine him.
Even when reading novels, watching movies, she always tried to imagine the male protagonist as Xiang Yuan.
In those first two years, time seemed like a huge void for her, constantly imprisoning her. She couldn’t communicate in English, didn’t dare to step out of the house, and didn’t know anyone around, so she had plenty of time to think about him alone... He was her whole world, he was her heaven and earth.
Even the hazy figures in her memory, she fitted all of his appearances onto them.
So gradually, she found that she had finally successfully "fallen in love" with him. She indulged herself in the love she had created, and she once thought she was very happy that way.
In those days, besides trying to love him, what else could she do?
Until... two years later, she slowly discovered his affair with Rosa, and she had to slowly step out of that glass-maze-like world of fantasy.
Step by step, each step was a heart-wrenching pain, full of scars.
Fortunately, by today, those wounds should have healed.
Being able to speak so openly, Shi Nian felt a sudden sense of relief: "Yes, the love and marriage between A Yuan and I were actually a misunderstanding. He married me out of gratitude, and I also nearly hypnotized myself into desperately loving him for the same reason, then stayed for gratitude... Delaying for so long, we both suffered because of it, and Rosa, you also suffered."
Shi Nian looked into Rosa’s eyes with sincerity: "...There is one thing I must admit: Rosa, you love him more than I do."
"Ha..." Rosa backed two steps with a bitter smile.
She came here today deliberately to cause a scene; she wanted to prevent the two of them from attending marriage consultation, she didn’t want them to reconcile!
Unexpectedly, she got such an answer from Shi Nian.
"Since you admit that I love him more than you do, why are you still clinging to him? Why don’t you want to divorce him? Being separated, why do you come for marriage consultation?" ᴜᴘᴅᴀᴛᴇ ꜰʀᴏᴍ novel·fire·net
Shi Nian took a deep breath: "Rosa, that’s not what I mean. It’s just that over these years, the Xiang Family gave me a home when I was most lonely and helpless, and took care of my mom, I can’t be ungrateful."
"As for attending this marriage consultation, it’s partly because I agreed to it in the separation agreement; also, I hope that through the analysis of our personalities by the experts during the consultation, A Yuan might gradually realize that we really are not suitable. So when the marriage consultation reaches its end, we can say ’farewell’ to each other in peace."
Shi Nian looked up quietly: "He is not my type... I once wondered how I could ’fall in love’ with him. I am also no longer the person he once thought; it’s better for both of us to separate."
Rosa was suspiciously staring at Shi Nian, as if judging the truth of Shi Nian’s words, when suddenly someone rushed over and grabbed Rosa’s elbow.
A voice of questioning exploded: "What are you doing here?!"
Rosa exclaimed: "A Yuan!"
Xiang Yuan, like an angry lion, tightly gripped Rosa’s wrist, "Speak, what are you doing here? And what did you tell Shi Nian? Speak up!"
Rosa was shocked: "A Yuan, listen... I just, just heard that you were coming for marriage consultation, I couldn’t take it! Finally waited until you separated, why must you still come for consultation."
Xiang Yuan’s fingers exerted force, and Rosa only felt her arm bone was about to be crushed. She pleaded, "A Yuan, please let go of me first."
Xiang Yuan’s eyes pressed close to her, questioning in a low voice: "Did you... tell her about that night?"
Rosa was tongue-tied, unwilling to answer, but her gaze drifted past Xiang Yuan to look at Shi Nian.
She dared to tell Shi Nian, but couldn’t admit it in front of Xiang Yuan.
Shi Nian was shocked but still rushed forward to pull Xiang Yuan’s hand: "Xiang Yuan, let her go first!"
Xiang Yuan took a calming breath, but his hand didn’t relax, still gripping Rosa’s arm fiercely, but he softened his voice to speak to Shi Nian: "Dear, I’m sorry it’s all my fault, I didn’t expect this J-person to come here and bother us. I know I was wrong, I’ll drive her away now."