However, Feng Qingxue was reluctant to set such a precedent.
If she were to adopt Gangzi, her home would become a safe haven, a real orphanage.
Were she to embody a spirit of selflessness, emulating those great female leaders, it would seem that she should do so. Following the growth of Lu Jiang’s venture, a decade or two later, she would be recognized as a heroic mother, achieving both fame and fortune.
Taking these children in during the famine years would be akin to bestowing upon them new parents, a highly noble act.
But she simply was not that great; she was just an ordinary woman.
She had elders at home, young ones to look after, plus she had to care for Lu Jiang’s comrades. Had their resources been limitless, it would have been fine, but they weren’t. The supply only went out but never came in. There would come a day when they ran dry.
What was most critical was this: who in the ten mile radius did not know everyone else’s business? If she housed this many kids, would not suspicions arise?
Others couldn’t feed their own kids, so what made it her responsibility to feed so many?
Orginally, when she registered Guan Cheng and Guan Yu - the two brothers - under her family’s household, unlike Jiang He who registered separately, there were already whispers and idle chatter behind her back. During the busy farming season, while weaving corn, many asked Feng Qingxue if she was still willing to take in more children, be they relatives who could no longer care for their child or those who planned on abandoning their newborn.
It was said in jest, but the intent was to probe.
Back then, Feng Qingxue had adamantly retorted: "Don’t even think of sending them to my house! I have enough kids as it is. We will have our own child next year; any more, and we simply couldn’t afford it. Who can say that I’d not have a second or third child, right? In these times, who doesn’t know the hardships of raising a child? Even if someone were to leave a child at my doorstep, I’d not take them in out of pity. The virtues of birth and care should mean that you bear and raise your own child; after having raised a child when they’re young, they will look after you when you’re old. Housing the Guan brothers had its reasons, the younger one looked like Tianzhi, triggering a kinship between them and Tianzhi liked him, the elder Guan Cheng could help out with the work. In my family, the old are old, the young are young, and a just-grown child is as good as half a laborer. I didn’t take them in for charity."
Worried about being accused of exploiting young Guan Cheng’s labor and continuing the Lu family’s tradition of exploiting tenant farmers and short-term workers, she quickly added, "Actually, the main reason I took in Guan Cheng was to make him my apprentice. He was willing to learn medicine from me and wants to become a doctor in our production brigade as a way of repaying the brigade for taking him in."
Since Guan Cheng and Guan Yu both had grain rations and could take care of themselves, the villagers knew that Feng Qingxue was not under great pressure to support them.
The matter of taking in the Guan brothers was thus dismissed.
Later on, someone had indeed tried to quietly leave a newly-born child that they thought they could not afford to raise at her doorstep. They had yet to set the baby down when they were spotted by Wang Jiao who had come over to visit.
With her sharp tongue and take-no-prisoners attitude, Wang Jiao scolded them thoroughly, sending them away embarrassed, child still in arms.
Turning around, Wang Jiao gave her an earful too, accusing her of blindly doing good and attracting trouble.
From then on, Feng Qingxue acted with caution,
Feng Qingxue told Old Song about this, "Old Song, please understand my predicament."
Old Song blinked his aging eyes and said with sadness, "So, you don’t intend to take in Gangzi either?"