EVER SINCE I became a teacher, or even before I became a teacher, I harboured trauma that I didn't dare tell anyone.
I keep having a recurring nightmare.
The nightmare has the events of... that day. I'll never forget them.
Each time I have that nightmare, it takes on a different form, changing my point of view, someone else's point of view; sometimes the chronological order of events is different. But there is one thing in common. No matter how many times I have that nightmare it ends the same way.
At that time, there was nothing to be afraid of. We were Class B and our momentum overwhelmed the other classes. We were well within reach of Class A. Of course, it wasn't a smooth road.
By the time I reached my third-year, the number of classmates who had left me had swelled to six. Even so, in my final year, I accumulated class points without letting a single student get expelled. I believed that I could graduate from Class A without having to leave anyone behind.
Until that day.
Until that exam.
At the end of the final semester, we were about to take the graduation exam, our last chance to turn things around. Our homeroom teacher stepped up to the podium with a stiff expression on her face and told us about a new special exam.
Of course, we didn't realize the danger of this special exam at first. The rules were simple and straightforward, and we had no doubt that we could succeed. But that optimistic mood lasted only until the exam started.
The scene changes and I am screaming in class.
My best friend, Chie, approaches me with an angry expression and grabs my chest.
I scream in agony.
The class, which had been united as one, collapsed in an instant .
"It's... over." He muttered, his face full of resignation and realization.
He had been my companion for the past three years, and he wasn't a trivial existence. He was my irreplaceable classmate, my irreplaceable friend.
As the opposite sex, he was an... irreplaceable person. He may have been a bit of a jerk, but he was serious, kind, and more reliable than anyone else.
I saw a face he's never shown before.
That moment when he reached out his hand to me under the evening sky, somewhat shyly. As I held back the tears that were about to spill, I said a few words.
I said, "I look forward to working with you..."
The relationship between the two of us ended just as it had begun.
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