He looked up, gazing into the distance across to the restaurant. The sky gradually dimmed, his vision no longer clear; he could only faintly make out Ling Chuxia on her phone replying, but he could not see the expression on her face anymore.
The phone finally made another beep.
It had only been a few dozen seconds, but for Shi Che, it seemed like an exceedingly long time had passed; he looked eagerly at his phone.
He saw Ling Chuxia’s reply: "Mhm, I... don’t want to be alone. It’s been a long time; I’ve always been alone on my birthday."
Perhaps it should be said that she had been alone for a very, very long time, so long that loneliness had been etched into her heart. And yet, hidden deep down, there was still a longing.
Longing for the night to grow still and quiet, for a gentle knock on the door five minutes before midnight.
But she knew it was no longer possible. It would never be possible in this lifetime.
After Ling Chuxia sent her message, she found it quite ridiculous. What was she doing? Although Mr. S had saved her, and they got along well, they were strangers after all. Why did she impulsively get someone to come spend her birthday with her?
She mocked herself with a wry smile and quickly typed another line: "I’m sorry, that was all nonsense; just pretend you didn’t see it."
On Shi Che’s end, his gaze was fixed on the previous message.
Doesn’t want to be alone... Has been alone on her birthday for a long time?
Even though the words were just on the screen, it seemed as if he could hear Ling Chuxia’s soft, weak, hoarse voice at his ear, sounding so heartbreaking.
But why was she alone? He was with her on every birthday for the past years; he just thought she never cared.
Because in those three years of marriage, the first year, even though he knew she married him for Ling Yunshu, to stay by his side at all costs, the day of her birthday, when she called, hesitantly asking if he would come home, his heart was still pulled in such a way he could not refuse.
When he returned home with a carefully selected gift, she was dressed in a flowing white gown, her usually curly hair was straightened, draped over her shoulders; she wore exquisite makeup, smiling so tender and lovely.
That was not her, Ling Chuxia, that was Ling Yunshu!
He came home for Ling Chuxia, not Ling Yunshu, but there she was, Ling Chuxia, forcefully styled into the image of Ling Yunshu. Official source is novęlfire.net
Looking at her delicate face with its polite smile, he felt only irony, only anger. Although Ling Chuxia didn’t say anything to upset him, he still couldn’t suppress the rage inside, lashed out at her, then stormed out, slamming the door behind him.
Afterward, on her birthdays, she never called him again. She would cook a table full of delicious food for herself, buy herself a cake, light a candle by herself, sing the birthday song alone, make a wish on her own, blow out the candle, eat the cake, and go to bed early.
She did it so fluidly, so naturally, with not a trace of discontent. He truly believed she simply didn’t care about him.
Year after year, he would come back, but he never set foot inside the house, fearing he would disturb her peace, leading to another unpleasant cold war.
But now he realized, she had been so afraid... to spend her birthday alone.