Cordia’s eyes widened as she glanced down at the ring on her finger. “What?” she asked Will, realizing at last what the misconception must be. “You know I don’t have feelings for Carey. I wrote you. I told you, I never even said yes.”
Will had spent ample time imagining how this conversation might go on his long and arduous trip home. His emotions had gotten the best of him several times, and he had run the gamut from extreme anger at her deception to despair. Now, face to face with the woman he had spent so much time thinking of and longing for throughout the course of his service, he couldn’t help but think of what might have been, if only she had been honest with him. There was one thought that kept returning to him time and again, and now, faced with the opportunity to voice it to her, he hesitated. Yet, he couldn’t help but say, “I guess I should have known better than to ever get involved with someone as fickle as you Cordia Pike. I realize now, however, that I deserve this. If this is what we were about to put Jaris through, well, then in some ways I envy him that he escaped this torment.”
Cordia looked at him in astonishment, her mouth open. “How can you say that?” she asked after a moment. He had turned away from her and was concentrating now on the wood he still needed to chop. It was as if he had not heard a word she had said. “I told you, Will. I don’t love Carey. I never have. I hate him! Why won’t you listen to me?”
Though Will wanted to believe her, he couldn’t, not while she was standing there wearing Carey Adams’s ring. After months of lamenting losing her, it wasn’t so simple to come home and accept that it was all a misunderstanding. If she truly loved him, how could she ever consent to be someone else’s wife? He turned and glanced in her general direction before walking toward the barn, saying only, “Goodbye Cordia. Good luck with the life that you’ve chosen.”
Exasperated, Cordia started to follow him. However, he was walking much faster than she could, her heavy gown weighing her down, and he had made it quite clear that he did not want to speak to her anymore. She could feel the hot tears splashing down her face as she watched him go. Still in a state of disbelief that he was actually home but that she still could not be with him, she realized that, regardless of whether or not Will ever forgave her poor judgment, there was one situation she needed to take care of immediately.
As she turned to walk back to where she had parked the wagon, she realized that Margaret was standing in the yard, near the back door. The expression on her face let Cordia know she had heard everything. For a moment, Cordia considered walking past her without saying a word, but she couldn’t do that. The least she could do was apologize, though she knew it would carry little weight. Without meeting her eyes, she whispered, “I am so sorry,” before making her way to her wagon and leaving the Adams Farm, possibly forever.
As she rode back to town, she knew she truly was sorry. Not for what had happened between Will and herself; she could never be sorry for that, not even now that it was apparently over. But she was truly sorry for the grief she would have caused to Jaris if he had lived. And, now, she was sorry for the pain she must have caused Margaret and the rest of his family, to learn the truth in such a startling and unexpected way must have made the realization that she had never intended to marry Jaris far worse than if Cordia and Will had sat the family down and explained everything to them, the way that Cordia had been intending to do these past two years. None of the conversations she was having this day were anything like she had pictured they would be. The next one probably would not be either, though the rage she felt brewing inside was a consolation for that. She brought the horses to a gallop as she turned them down the road that led to the home Carey shared with his father. Will was certainly correct about one thing, she never should have allowed herself to be placed in such a compromising position, and she had been far too polite for much longer than she should have been. Her parents would just have to accept the fact that she was not marrying Carey Adams. Whether or not this would be enough to bring Will back around, she could not say, but it was a step in the right direction.
The wind was picking up, and Cordia realized she had forgotten her coat. The anger building up inside of her was enough to keep her from becoming too cold, however, and she pressed on, eager to finally have the opportunity to say the words she had been thinking for so very long.
She continued to go over the brief words she had exchanged with Will and was still in disbelief that he had thought for these past two months that she was truly engaged to Carey, that she had picked that scoundrel over her one true love. She still could not fathom how her letters suddenly stopped being delivered to him while, clearly, he was receiving word from someone in town, most likely his Aunt Margaret. Just as she pulled the horses to a halt in front of Carey’s house, she realized there was only one person who would be devious enough to confiscate her mail.
She jumped down from the carriage and stormed her way up the short walkway to the front door, giving it a good pounding. She was not sure if he would be home for the noontime meal yet or if he would still be at the square. Either way, she would track him down and set things straight, regardless of who may be present.