Bai Mei is now physically and mentally exhausted, tangled up with a bunch of messed-up family affairs. Today, there’s really no time to write.
Some of the hardships can’t be shared with family members, so Bai Mei had to take the opportunity of asking for leave to pour out these troubles to everyone.
As for me, I have an older brother. Life isn’t going well for him, as he and his wife both lost their jobs years ago and still haven’t found work. Recently, they couldn’t pay the mortgage and came to borrow money from me. As soon as they opened their mouth, they asked for one hundred thousand.
I couldn’t come up with it at once, so after a lot of persuasion, I gave him fifty thousand. I thought my brother and his wife could make it through this year. Unexpectedly, they came to borrow money again yesterday and today.
Sigh! They said their online loan has been overdue for two months.
My parents have already drained their savings for us two siblings. They don’t have much money left, and whatever they do have is their bottom-line retirement fund, which can’t be touched by anyone!
Actually, I’m quite reluctant to lend, but my brother called me several times over two days, saying if I don’t lend him money, he’d have to ask our parents.
Listening to him put it like this, what else could I say? I had no choice but to take out thirty thousand from my deposit and give it to him.
This has been the thing troubling Bai Mei recently.
Another major headache is my fourth aunt’s family.
This family is a Bottomless Pit, not only having borrowed from relatives and friends over the years but also having unknown amounts in bank loans. They owe at least twenty creditors.
To put it this way, my fourth aunt’s family has five people. There’s a grandmother over ninety, a younger cousin brother in sixth grade. My cousin sister just graduated from college this year and is still jobless. The couple hasn’t found work for almost a year, and there’s no land to farm at home.
In other words, there’s no source of income at all.
Last July, my fourth aunt, having no other options, came to me for a loan, saying my cousin sister’s loan of one hundred thousand was coming due, hoping to borrow money to pay it off and take out a new loan.
When I was a child, my fourth aunt’s family was well-off and honestly treated us two siblings well. This was also the first time they asked to borrow money. At that time, I had just paid off a home and car loan and didn’t have much money on hand. So, I lent three thousand for emergency use.
By the end of the year, my fourth aunt returned two thousand (actually, to avoid my parents’ words. My mom is the eldest among her siblings and also lent their family the most).
By this March, my cousin sister from my fourth aunt’s family called to borrow money (the reasons being looking for a job, renting an apartment, student loans, etc.). I knew these were excuses, but I’m soft-hearted, so I transferred three thousand to her (and comforted her not to rush in repaying).
In mid-June, my cousin sister called again crying, saying her mother was depressed to the point of being not normal, paranoid all day, afraid to step out, and heavily dependent on her (calling nonstop if she doesn’t see her around).
My fourth uncle has a very violent temper, spends money extravagantly. Domestic and verbal abuse are frequent occurrences. So my fourth aunt is terribly afraid of him, always shouting that she’ll be beaten to death by him (a few years ago, my uncle used to earn over ten thousand a month, supporting the family. But now he’s over fifty and unemployed for more than a year).
I don’t know the exact reason, but at least since 2021, my fourth aunt has been taking out loans behind her family’s back to repay debts, persisting until last year when everything blew up.
Actually, I’ve long known that my cousin sister secretly borrowed from every cousin she could (my older brother doesn’t have money, the third aunt’s side gave two thousand, the second aunt’s cousin sister just had a baby, and her cousin brother-in-law earns three thousand a month security job, no money).
But as I said, I’m too soft-hearted. Hearing my cousin sister scare me on the phone like she might do something foolish, I was startled into stealthily sending her another two thousand, whispering comforting words for half an hour.
So, this thing is temporarily over, altogether six thousand, with no idea when or if it’ll ever be returned.
But all these issues aren’t the end. The most important is my fear that in a few months, my cousin sister might call again to borrow money (then, to lend or not to lend, what a dilemma).
Today, I calculated the accounts, and it scared me. Six thousand from my fourth aunt’s family, eight thousand from my brother’s family, two thousand from friends, totaling sixteen thousand in debts.
Besides the debts, I also have to consider my parents’ retirement, mortgage, car loan, and our household expenses, all aspects included.
Forget it, just thinking about it gives me a headache.
It’s exhausting writing this. Bai Mei is very grateful to the book friends, thankful for everyone’s patience in listening to Bai Mei ramble about personal troubles.
Respectfully, salute!