Faced with the young girl’s questioning, Xu Ming didn’t know how to answer.
It felt like both were true, yet neither was.
Did he really have no feelings for Zhu Cici at all?
When an extraordinarily beautiful girl confesses her feelings for you, saying you don’t feel anything would be a lie.
And was he keeping his distance from her just because he didn’t want to ruin her childhood memories of him?
That wasn’t entirely true either.
Perhaps, more than anything, he simply didn’t want to deceive her pure and sincere feelings.
Or maybe, it was just his own selfishness—his unwillingness to shatter the good impression she had of him from childhood.
He didn’t want her to feel disappointed in who he had become.
Seeing Xu Ming’s hesitation and inner conflict, Zhu Cici’s lips curled into a small, triumphant smile, like a little girl who had won a game.
“Why is Young Master Xu not answering Cici?”
Xu Ming sighed again, his tone filled with helplessness.
“Miss Cici, to be honest with you, I already have feelings for two women. Yes, you heard that right—two, not just one.”
Hearing Xu Ming’s words, Zhu Cici pressed her thin lips together tightly, feeling a pang of sorrow in her heart.
She had expected that Xu Ming might already have someone he loved.
She also knew that, even if it were true, she had no right to blame him.
After all, how could a childhood promise be taken so seriously?
Not to mention, she had never come to see him in all these years.
For Xu Ming to have someone in his heart—wasn’t that perfectly normal?
But even though she had mentally prepared for this possibility, actually hearing him say it still made her heart ache.
After confessing, Xu Ming himself felt somewhat like a scumbag.
But he had no choice—he really didn’t want to deceive this pure-hearted girl.
It wasn’t out of fear that deceiving her would bring retaliation from Qi Kingdom or White Deer Academy.
It was simply because he believed that a girl like her should never be lied to.
Someone so talented and exceptional deserved a love she truly believed in.
“Who are the two women?” Zhu Cici asked, a trace of unwillingness in her voice.
Even though she already had a guess, she still wanted to hear him say it himself.
“One is my childhood friend, now the Saintess of Tianxuan Sect—Qin Qingwan. We were born at the same time and grew up together. Even when she left for Tianxuan Sect, I never forgot her.
The other is the princess of the Wu Kingdom—Wu Yanhán. Although I declined the emperor’s marriage decree at the time, it was only because I didn’t want to be bound by the Wu Kingdom. There are many things I wish to accomplish.
But the truth is, I do have feelings for Yanhán.”
At this point, whatever Zhu Cici wanted to know, Xu Ming would answer without reservation.
He was fully transparent.
Xu Ming believed that once Zhu Cici realized that the person she had been holding onto was just a fickle, indecisive man, she would naturally give up on him.
He truly didn’t want to be so blunt—he knew it would hurt the beautiful memories she cherished.
But Zhu Cici was an incredibly stubborn girl.
If he didn’t say it outright, who knew how long she would continue to dwell on it?
How much time she would waste?
Better to rip off the bandage quickly than to let the pain linger.
At most, she would be disheartened for a while.
Then, she would move on to embrace a new life.
After all, she hadn’t spent much time with him.
She hadn’t fallen too deep.
Letting go wouldn’t be that difficult.
After Xu Ming finished speaking, silence fell between them once again.
Zhu Cici lowered her head as if lost in thought, while Xu Ming simply stood there, quietly waiting for her response.
After a long pause, Zhu Cici finally lifted her head and took a deep breath.
“As long as you understand, Miss Cici. But… if you don’t mind, perhaps we could still be friends.”
When two people fail to become lovers, it’s usually difficult for them to be friends.
Even if they do, there’s always a deliberate sense of distance between them.
This has been the way of things since ancient times.
Xu Ming’s suggestion was merely a way to ease the tension between them, to give them both a way out without making things too awkward.
As for whether they could truly become friends—that was uncertain.
Zhu Cici, however, didn’t respond to his suggestion. Instead, she looked at him and asked,
“Then how does Young Master Xu truly see me?”
She didn’t follow the conversation in the direction of “becoming friends.”
“I just want to ask—does Young Master Xu truly feel nothing for me at all?”
Xu Ming shook his head.
“Miss Zhu, you are a beauty of unparalleled grace, rare in this world. You are knowledgeable, well-mannered, and elegant in temperament. I believe that any normal man, upon meeting you, would naturally develop feelings for you.”
Zhu Cici’s lips curled into a smile.
“So that includes Young Master Xu as well.”
Xu Ming hesitated for a moment, then nodded.
“Yes, I do as well. But… my feelings are nothing more than fleeting attraction.”
Zhu Cici let out a light laugh, covering her mouth gently.
“Young Master Xu, you are quite straightforward.”
“I simply can’t bring myself to deceive you,” Xu Ming replied, looking into her deep, ink-black eyes.
“So, Miss Cici, this is the kind of person I am—a fickle man unworthy of your affection.”
Zhu Cici shook her head.
“Whether someone is worthy of my affection or not—that is for me to decide.”
Then, she added, “But I am glad that Young Master Xu was willing to tell me everything.”
“You’re too kind, Miss Cici.”
“There’s one more question I’d like to ask—if Young Master Xu is willing to answer?”
Her long eyelashes trembled slightly.
Xu Ming cupped his hands in a respectful gesture.
“Please, ask away. As long as it is within my ability to answer.”
Zhu Cici fixed her ink-colored eyes on him, as if she could see through every subtle change in his gaze.
“When we were children—did you ever like me?”
Xu Ming’s lips parted slightly, then closed again. Finally, he exhaled and spoke slowly.
“When we were children… I did like you.”
Zhu Cici took a step back, smiling as she looked at Xu Ming.
“You keep saying that you’ve changed, but in my eyes, you’re still the same. Still always thinking of others before yourself.”
“So… allow me to give you my response.”
A sea breeze swept past, lifting the hem of her dress and gently brushing through her hair. Zhu Cici raised a hand to press down the strands by her cheek, her smile blooming like pear blossoms in an ink painting.
“I will never be friends with you, Xu Ming. Not now, not ever.”