A man went to a laundry.
He gave a dress to the worker there and said, "Can you get this stain out of my dress?"
The worker didn't hear him. "Come again?"
The man replied, "No. This time it's salad cream."
Anyway, after that climax, I sent that Hero to stand outside the room with his hands in the air.
I punished him for what he had done.
He was doing that because he wanted to show me that my comedy is so good that it got him screaming without the s.
I do like his good intentions but I don't want such die hard fans. Emphasis on hard.
Whatever, after sending that Hero out, I can finally talk about things that are usually discussed in meetings.
And I will try not to tell them any jokes. They would just fake laughter again or worse, wank.
I am on my throne right now with a serious face. My stats are Off since I defeated that Awakened Alien. I hope I don't have to turn them On again soon.
"First things first.." I said.
The Heroes paid attention to me. The wanker Hero could also hear my words so it was good.
"From now on, Erect is my assistant. My right hand, you could say."
I announced. Erect will be my right hand and if I don't meet a girl soon, my right hand will surely experience something different. Just kidding. I do that with my left hand.
[ End this topic! Enough about it. ]
Supreme Man chimed in. It seems he doesn't like such things.
Whatever, after my announcement, Erect jolted up from his seat.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Thank you for such honor, my lord. I will satisfy you as your right hand."
I would like you not.
"Erect will manage things before me. And only those things which is out of his reach, should come to me. Got it?"
All the Heroes replied. The wanker from outside shouted too.
Now that's out of the way, time to do the second main thing.
"Tell me all your names."
I don't know their names yet.
But before hearing their names, I used one of my skills.
I can't remember all the names of the Heroes so I have a Skill to help me with that.
This is the name and what it does is that it makes sure that I remember everything.
After that, one by one Heroes stood up and shared their names.
"My name is Ted Bundy, my lord."
Who made you roam free?
I will stay away from this guy.
Next Hero said, "Pedo."
I am not sure if I heard Pedro.
He had a problem sitting back down on his chair but he did.
No appointments I'll take for this one.
This word exist here?
That's just gibberish.
I'll give him a biscuit later.
Didn't see that coming.
Like that, names kept coming and all forty nine Heroes shared their name and even that wanker Hero standing outside revealed his name. You can guess what his name might be from the list above.
Now only Erect was left. I already know his name but a protocol is a protocol.
I looked at Erect and the Hero shared his name :
"Pardon? What's your name?"
"It's Erec T, my lord. Erec Tile." The latest_epɪ_sodes are on_the NoveI-Fire.ɴet
He had the same type of name as me. Back in the village he told me his name was Erect. I didn't know there was a space after Erec.
"Who gave you this name?" I asked.
I smiled. "It's a good name."
I will still call him Erect though. It'd be a pain to suddenly change names.
Erect bowed and the introductions were done.
Now some info dumping.
"Who rules this world? I don't know because I lived in a small village."
"You, my lord." Erect said. "I am sure you have enough power to see the whole world. You are now the ruler of all the five continents that we still have. Each continent has a castle if you ever wish to visit them. Throw the Aliens away and then you will rule over all seven continents."
That's a good setting.
"How many Aliens are there in total? Any estimate?"
"Probably millions. They reproduce so fast over the years. All the Heroes had their hands full."
"But if all the Heroes of this world are here, who is looking over the Aliens? What if they attack while you all are here?"
"The soldiers will inform us. They have enough power to handle some Aliens."
"How often do the Aliens attack? And if they reproduce very fast, when did they get time to attack?"
"They attack once every month randomly. This month's attack has yet to happen. And a female alien gives birth in just ten days of pregnancy and they are immediately ready to produce another one."
No wonder they have a monopoly over porn.
Bang Ufos, their company should be called.
Anyway, I can't think of any other questions now.
"Yes?" The wanker Hero answered from outside.
"You can com- enter now." I have to be careful with words with him from now on.
"As you say. I am really sorry for my behaviour, my lord. It's the dopamine that makes me do it."
Beater entered the room, apologising all the way to his seat.
He sat down and I said nothing to him mostly because I was afraid to say anything to him.
"How do you guys communicate with each other when you are in different places?" I asked Erect.
"All the soldiers and Heroes have telepathy skills. We can talk through our minds."
"What about the common people then? How do they communicate?"
"They... just use their mouths?"
"So," I leaned back on my throne. "When is it most likely for the Aliens to attack? They attack once every month. And they haven't done it this month yet. Any guesses?"
The Heroes thought about it and all of them said in unison :
"They can attack right now."
That was only one time thing that happened at the stage back at the village.
It won't happen again.
My words won't always come true.
No other thump will happen.
And no group of Aliens will shout This is an Alien attack. Hahaha.
"This is an Alien attack! Hahaha!!"
This motherf- Why is every word I am saying is happening? Am I wired or something?