His death by my own hands.
That’s what I want now.
I let go of my swords, they clattered to the ground like dropped mics.
No more swords because I won’t chop his head in one swing anymore.
I will strangle this bastard with my own hands.
"Set a table for you?" Malthus scoffed. "Aren’t we getting too confident, human king?"
He stood tall, his horns remained proud and his smile? Still cocky.
I should have allowed him to show his snake and worm dance.
The Alien King—who once threatened to make me fill all his holes—had three less holes now. His head was gone, I mean.
Unlike Erect, he did get to show his dance but I shouldn’t have allowed him. Now his last memory for me is of him simply walking forward while calling it a dance move.
"You are going to regret killing them."
"I won’t." Malthus scoffed. "And what were you expecting? Of course I was here to kill people. It was you who weren’t taking this seriously and making jokes. Whenever a serious thing happened, you joked and these two joined you. Now, I don’t need to worry about it anymore. I killed them for my sake."
"As long as I was joking, you were alive, Malthus. Now the joke’s on you."
Malthus tilted his head. "You done playing the angry hero?"
My hand went to my pants’ pocket. I pulled out a single item—
I unfolded it slowly.
"I don’t want blood stains on my chest when I eat your heart," I said, tying the white handkerchief around my neck like a baby about to destroy mashed potatoes.
The audience, Malthus’ soldiers, and the Gods above watching?
They went silent. No one moved. No one blinked.
When a man ties a cloth before a fight—
He’s not coming to battle.
He’s coming to FEAST.
Malthus narrowed his eyes. "Do you think this is funny?"
I shrugged. "No. But don’t worry—once I kill you, your tombstone will have killer punchlines."
"Now we are talking, human king!"
Malthus shot forward like lightning, his hands glowing red.
But it landed on the ground—
Because I wasn’t there.
I was already behind him.
"Oh no," I whispered, leaning to his ear.
"You dropped your ego."
I kicked him in the back of his head. He rolled.
"Kill him, hero king!"
"Show him what you are made of!"
"You are not a jester anymore!"
I am not a jester anymore.
For the first time since the war had started, the crowd didn’t act like a kid who was angry because his mother married someone before his birth.
This time the people acted like they were supposed to.
They truly cheered for me and fucking hell, I felt a surge of strength rushing from every parts of me. I felt like a man who was just insulted by a fat man and was about to drop the sickest insult ever made for overweights.
After my kick, Malthus stood up and wiped blood from his lip. "You think you’re dangerous?"
"I am the reason therapists ask ’What’s really bothering you?’ twice."
"They won’t be able to ask anymore."
He launched again, faster this time. He was strong. Terrifying.
But I was more annoying than any threat he’d ever faced.
I punched the ground, my hand went inside it.
Then I brought out my hand.
But my hand wasn’t alone.
It held a portion of land.
I plucked out the land itself.
My strength was beyond even my imagination.
A large chunk of land was in my hand, round in shape.
Malthus’ back was facing me so before he could turn around and see, I hurled that land like it was an ugly child—at Malthus.
The next second, Malthus turned but it was too late.
His whole body met with that huge stone as it shattered into pieces just upon contact.
As the dust vanished, I saw him clutching his right thigh with the expression of a bride who broke her spine while throwing the bouquet of flowers behind her. ᴜᴘᴅᴀᴛᴇ ꜰʀᴏᴍ NoveI-Fire.ɴet
"Thighs are your weakness? Mine too. But not the way you think."
He growled. "You dare mock me?!"
"Not anymore. I have put the comedy on hold, you see. Now I just want to bash you up."
Malthus roared, letting go of his thigh again launching towards me.
As if I would let him come near me.
I punched the ground near his feet, making the earth explode. Malthus was launched into the air.
He flailed. Helpless.
"Remember Erect and Sexis?"
"They told me something before they died... well they weren’t able to say it from their own mouth since you killed them instantly, but I believe, before dying, they said..."
We both crashed down.
"Did he... win?" Someone whispered.
A child chimed. "Mommy, I wanna be like him."
The mom clutched her chest. "No, sweetheart. He’s emotionally unstable and his friends keep dying."
"If you insist on becoming like him, I will tell you that you are adopted."
"Adorable. I said, adorable."
Don’t worry, kiddo. Considering how your mother is, you will surely become like me one day. Not Overpowered but surely the Comedian part.
Anyway, me and Malthus were lying side by side.
We both fell from a good amount of height. If I went a little higher, I would have smoked a joint with God.
I raised my head to glance at Malthus and instantly grimaced.
His chest was heaving up and down.
The bastard was still alive!