I Just Wanted a Quiet Life... So Why Am I an Uma Musume Trainer? Chapter 31

Hello, everyone. Hikitani Hachiman, trainer. Straight up, I need help.

"Trainer-san, do something!" an Uma Musume pleads.

"Please, we're begging!" another chimes in.

"We want to get stronger too!" a third adds.

I'm swarmed by Uma Musume, pleading. Why? Well…

"Do that training again! Without you, we don't know what's right!" one says.

"Start the tag game again!" another demands.

Yup, they're here because of the tag game I started as training. It exploded among the Uma Musume, with groups forming to train together. Great, right? But then they came to me, confused about fixes and follow-ups. Turns out, everyone here joined Air Groove for that tag game.

"Look," I say, "that tag game was for Air Groove's weaknesses. I'm not planning to do it again."

"Whaaat!?" they cry in unison.

CB pipes up, "I thought we found a fun way to run! Come on, Trainer, let's do it again!"

"Why're you jumping in, CB?" I groan. "Anyway, no plans for it. And you said 'fun'—is that menu fun?"

"It's super fun!!" they shout together.

Wow, no wonder they're begging…

"I appreciate the enthusiasm," I say, "but I'm not taking tag game requests or planning to do it. So…"

"Trainer-san?" one prompts.

I'm focusing on hill training twice a week, plus strength and mile-running form. Hmm, could this work?

"I just thought of a new training idea," I say. "Wanna try—"

"Yes!!" they shout, cutting me off.

"Hold up! I haven't even said what it is!" I protest. Gotta talk to Air Groove first. Ugh, this is a mess.

In the pupil council room, Air Groove raises a brow. "A new hill menu?"

"Yeah," I say. "I wanted your input. You've been training solo lately, so I thought group practice might be good."

"You got begged by other Uma Musume, didn't you?" she says. "They want the tag game from my debut prep."

"…You saw through me, huh?" I admit.

"Of course," she says.

Symboli Rudolf leans in. "But what's this training about, Hikitani Trainer?"

"The key part," I say, "is a twist on a scavenger hunt—call it a Shopping Race."

At the cafeteria, I'm eating lunch with the pupil council crew.

Air Groove presses, "Explain this in detail."

"It's exactly what I said," I reply.

"What are we shopping for?" she asks.

Narita Brian scoffs, "Got no brains, huh?"

"What if the prompt's steak?" I counter.

"Don't think about it, Brian!" Air Groove snaps.

Rudolf chuckles. "Hold on. Seriously, Hikitani Trainer, what's in this?"

"Air Groove's hill training mimics Tokyo's final stretch—full sprint," I explain. "That's the base. Add elements like breaking ahead with someone in front or holding your lead. The finish is before the corner, not after. But there's a flaw."

"A flaw?" Brian asks.

"It hogs the course," I say. "Could block others. So, it's an idea but also a rejected one."

Rudolf nods. "A valid concern."

"Then it's a no-go?" Air Groove says.

"But I find it intriguing," Rudolf counters. "The right prompts could make it competitive. When's this happening, Trainer-kun?"

"Yesterday was Tuesday's hill training," I say. "I'm thinking the next one, day after tomorrow."

"I see…" Rudolf says.

"President," Air Groove says, "are you joining?"

"Why not try it once?" Rudolf says. "If it's risky, we scrap it. Members will be us pupil council folks and… one more. Who'd be good?"

"I've got someone in mind if we go for it," I say. "Not set yet, but would they work?"

"Is this person trustworthy?" Brian asks.

"Not a bad sort," I say. "Yeah, not bad."

"That makes me uneasy," Air Groove mutters.

Rudolf smiles. "Let's try it after school day after tomorrow. Got the course reserved?"

"Then it's set," Rudolf says.

Rudolf glances over. "By the way, Trainer-kun, you brought your own lunch?"

"Yeah," I say. "Cafeteria's great, but it costs. I don't mind cooking, so I've started recently."

Air Groove nods. "I thought it'd be all brown, but it's colorful. Well-balanced."

"I'm a trainer, after all," I say.

Brian cuts in, "Oi, let's swap."

"No way, I can't handle that much," I say.

"Not that—meat," she says.

"…Fine, I'll give one if it's this size," I say.

"Here you go," I say.

Brian takes a bite. "…!! Damn, that's good!"

"Glad you like it," I say.

Two days later, it's Friday—hill training day, and the promised Shopping Race trial. Air Groove and the pupil council crew are joining, which is great… but seriously, don't you guys have your own trainers? No one's assigned to you? I know I'm one to talk after saying no, but come on, show a little urgency!

Air Groove bows slightly. "President, thank you for helping today."

"No need to thank me," Symboli Rudolf says. "I'm curious about this training's effects. Between the tag game and now, Hikitani Trainer's ideas are fascinating."

"…I suppose," Air Groove says.

"It started as a workaround," I say, "but there's no rule against training non-assigned Uma Musume."

Narita Brian grunts, "Sharp-eyed trainer."

Rudolf tilts her head. "Speaking of, you mentioned inviting someone two days ago. Not here yet?"

"Yeah, looks like—" I start, but a voice cuts in, "Sorry I'm late!!!"

A figure dashes up. "Class president duties called! I had to help a teacher—it's my mission!"

"Nice work," I say. "As expected of Bakushin, class president."

She puffs out her chest. "Heh, not that great!!"

The one I invited is Sakura Bakushin O, from the Sakura clan, a rival to the Mejiro family. She's a top-tier talent, even winning high-level mock races. She'll hold her own here.

Rudolf nods. "Sakura Bakushin O, huh? Her explosive speed makes sense."

"That's the idea," I say. "Let's start. For warm-up, do three course laps, then drills, followed by a half-lap at 50-60% speed. Hydrate, then we hit hill training."

"Understood," Rudolf says. "Let's go, everyone."

"Yes, President," Air Groove replies.

"Got it!" Bakushin chirps.

Time to prep while they warm up.

As we run, Brian glances at me. "Didn't expect that trainer to bring you, Bakushin. When'd you meet?"

"A month ago, we first talked!" I say. "I remember it vividly! I was training for a long-distance menu when Trainer-san showed up and said, 'I won't tell you not to run long distances, but stop now. In your state, you'll break.'"

"What'd he mean?" Air Groove asks.

"I think he noticed my leg's condition," I say. "Right when I kept training, a sharp pain hit. I went to the infirmary, and my left leg was one step from a muscle tear. Since then, I've avoided long-distance training."

I was probably rushing. Miho no Bourbon stretched her short-distance aptitude to mid-distance, so I thought, if she could, why not me? Arrogance, maybe.

Rudolf murmurs, "I see…"

"That moment made me stricter with myself," I say. "And I envied Air Groove-san. I heard later he's her trainer, but anyone seeing his skill would feel the same."

"I understand," Rudolf says. "He's unusually sensitive about injuries. We take care, but his awareness feels… different."

"How so?" Brian asks.

"Those who saw Miho no Bourbon's lameness would get it," Rudolf says. "It changed him. I suspect something deep happened."

Air Groove nods. "He's strict about post-training stretches and care."

I wonder what's in Trainer-san's past? But prying might upset him, so I'll hold off!

"Let's wait for Trainer-san to share when he's ready!" I say. "Right now, focus on training! It's hill training, and it's tough! Let's go all-out, Bakushin-style!!"

Brian agrees, "She's right. Focus on training."

"Right," Rudolf says.

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