Leif merely raised his hands, surprised that something would cause Irene to pull herself away so abruptly when he was merely trying to help.
Was it offensive that he asked about it? He knew there were some things regarding the bloodline she came from that were out of his knowledge, but for her to be so horrified that he had asked about it at all was alarming to him.
"No, hold on," Irene interrupted him. "I haven’t shown anyone this before. I just feel I will be misunderstood by those who aren’t Sünstoian, that’s all."
Her voice started harsh but finished more softly. She felt bad only sharing half-truths but she didn’t know what to say.
"What does it mean?" he asked.
Irene’s eyes dropped to her shoulder and she lifted her right hand to gently trace along the side of the tattoo. A faraway smile pulled at her mouth.
"My grandmother gave it to me," she explained. "It protects my soul and ensures that I am on the right path."
Leif was a bit relieved the other apprentice didn’t decide to keep it to herself. His curiosity ate away at him sometimes and he knew it wasn’t the best trait to have.
"You always talk about destiny and paths," he realized. "Even when you read things in the library you go on about it."
"Oh, forgive me," Irene responded, lightly rolling her eyes. "You’re never paranoid that you’re not doing the right thing?"
She wanted badly for him to say he worried about something like that too, but she imagined not many others had the strange experience of waking up one day feeling as if they had lived an entire other life.
"Isn’t everyone a bit worried about that?" he asked. "I know that my parents sending me letters about how much I should be on the family farm doesn’t help much of anything, but the overall path of life is something everyone worries about." Chapters first released on novelꞁire.net
She felt somewhat relieved at his words, feeling further guilty that she hadn’t been fully honest with him.
"What’s so wrong with wanting to be a knight and protecting people?" Irene quietly wondered.
Leif laughed at that despite the situation they were in. He then lifted her arm and angled it towards its owner.
There were jagged cuts below her tattoo that dragged downward from the man’s spiked weapon. Dried blood was even lower than that.
"This is why," he reminded her. "Who wants to see their loved ones getting hurt all the time?"
"Certainly not my mother," she joked.
Leif went silent as he contemplated the other apprentice’s words. Even though it was a joke, it still struck a chord within him.
"Seems we both have people in our lives who don’t want us in the knighthood," he realized. The topic started feeling heavy and he distracted himself by beginning to clean off the cuts on her shoulder. "No matter what anyone says, I think it’s a good thing that someone is willing to do what it takes to ensure that the duchy and people inside are safe. Even if we never make it to the very top, the effort is all that matters."
Irene squeezed her eyes shut. His words were rousing thoughts inside of her that she had been trying to suppress.
"But we killed people today," Irene muttered. "Isn’t that a failure of our duties to protect the subjects of the duchy? No one hardly batted an eye at the screams of bandits’ throats being slashed merely because it was on behalf of those in the Royal Family."
Leif was silent again as he put ointment on the girl’s shoulder and began wrapping it snugly so it would stay on a least through the night.
"Everyone in the kingdom knows that the payment for taking a life is a life," Leif admitted. "There was no other way to interpret their actions other than that they were trying to kill the Crown Prince or Princess. If they succeeded it would mean that we were already dead. If we survived but their highnesses did not, we would be put to death regardless."
Leif tied the final knot in the bandage before pulling his hands away. He sat up straight after leaning forward to bandage the other apprentice.
"Dammit, Iro," he said. "You’re meant to be younger than me. Why are you talking like an old weathered knight? Perhaps you eavesdrop on your father too much."
Since it was clear he was trying to cheer her up, Irene managed a smile.
"I don’t eavesdrop," Irene insisted. "My father’s voice is loud enough that there’s no such thing as a secret in my home growing up."
"Quite different from my father," Leif admitted. "You would have to crack open his head to reveal his thoughts."
Irene’s laugh came a little easier even though she was still weighed down by what had just occurred. She needed to think more about it and perhaps look into what the Sünsto thought of killing. Was there ever justification?
Leif stood up and pulled the chair back to where it was before in the center of the room and alongside a round, circular table.
Sir Gunnar soon came into the room. With him came a lot of noise as he began to remove his armor.
"We found the village leader," he explained to the apprentices. "Not much more can be done about now. The Royal Knights must take a record of those they found and immediately identified. I will have to speak to them later and give my own account."
There were shelves for armor alongside the wall and the knight took advantage of one of them. Irene quickly jumped up and began helping him hang up his things as well.
"After supper, all apprentices will lend a hand in helping clean knights’ armor," he explained. "Today was gruesome—to say the least."
When Irene was finished placing the last of the armor on the stand, she waited patiently for further instruction.
Gunnar turned to both of the apprentices in the room.
"I am proud of your resilience today," he expressed. "Both of you."
Irene did well on her own and when it became a bit too much, Leif was responsive and didn’t hesitate to save his friend.
The two gave their thanks to the knight but he wasn’t finished.
"Now don’t shirk on eating," he reminded them. "That is the most important thing you can do to ensure you have the energy to face the cold and protect the Royals."