The Kage stared at their massive new pets with bitter faces.
Sure, they had technically "bought" them, but now what? None of them had brought enough manpower to actually haul these mountain-sized beasts back to their homelands.
Seeing their frustration, Uchiha Gin stepped forward, lips curled in a sly smile.
"Of course, if everyone is willing to pay just a teeny tiny shipping fee, Konoha might be able to spare some hands for home delivery~"
Madara, who had been whispering with Hashirama about dinner, shivered for no reason, as if sensing danger from behind.
"Another fee? You can't throw in free delivery?" Ishiwa (First Tsuchikage) barked. "We already spent a fortune! You trying to rob us blind?"
"Sorry. Remote areas aren't covered." Gin shook his head with mock pity.
"Then just cancel the hypnosis. We'll drive them home ourselves!" Ishiwa insisted, hands on hips, pointing at the sleeping Yonbi and Gobi.
"…Are you sure about that?" Gin blinked.
These weren't farm pigs. If the Gobi woke up and trampled him flat, he'd be very dead.
"Don't look down on me!"
Of course, as the unifier of the Stone Country's shinobi, Ishiwa had real skill.
Gin shrugged. "Fine, cousin. Our Iwa friends want to 'sample the merchandise.'"
Madara stepped up without a word, scarlet eyes gleaming.
"Yonbi," Ishiwa said grimly.
Madara gave a curt nod. "Done."
He leapt forward, Susanoo's skeletal hand forming behind him, and promptly punched Yonbi in the face.
Gin slapped his forehead. I said wake it, not physically abuse it… Where's your genjutsu? Your fire style?
Inside Yonbi's dream, Son Gokū was chasing a lovely pink-bow-wearing gorilla maiden. Just as he was about to claim his prize—SMASH!—the maiden turned into a towering blue giant that socked him square in the jaw.
With a roar, Yonbi jolted awake, furious.
"Humans! You ruined my dream date!"
Heat rolled off him in waves. The Kage wisely scattered—except Ishiwa and his bandaged partner, Wu.
"Earth Style: Earth Flow Wall!" Ishiwa slammed the ground, raising a massive stone barrier just in time for Yonbi's magma breath. The rock hissed, cracked, and began to melt.
Wu's voice rasped: "Lord Tsuchikage, be careful!"
"Don't underestimate me, beast!"
They launched skyward using Light–Heavy Rock Technique, drawing gasps from the other Kage. Flight was nearly unheard of.
Ishiwa exhaled, gaze narrowing on the molten wall dissolving beneath. So this is the true power of a Bijū… One wrong step and even I could be finished.
"Should I use it?" Wu whispered.
"No. You're not healed. I'll handle this myself."
Landing back on solid ground, Ishiwa pressed his palms to the earth.
"Earth Style: Swamp of the Underworld!"
The ground liquefied beneath Yonbi, dragging the beast into a muddy mire.
"Earth Style: Mountain Boulder Dumpling!"
Raising his hand, Ishiwa hurled a colossal boulder down.
Gin munched watermelon on his folding stool. "Simple, brutal, effective. Gotta respect it."
Madara cut his watermelon with disdain. "Hmph. Crude tricks." (Though his eyes had grown sharper.)
"Brother Ai, watermelon?" Gin offered Raikage.
Yonbi roared, charging up a Tailed Beast Ball. The black sphere vaporized Ishiwa's boulder in an instant.
The Tsuchikage staggered. Worse, his swamp began glowing red, magma bubbling up. Yonbi's chakra had transmuted the swamp into a lava pool.
Gin cupped his hands around his mouth. "If it's too much, just holler!"
"Hmph!" Ishiwa ignored him, pride burning. He slammed his hands down again.
"Earth Style: Mountain Earth Technique!"
Straining every cell of his old body, he conjured a massive dome of stone to entrap Yonbi.
"Impressive…" Gin muttered. Even Madara was watching closely now.
But Yonbi bellowed, arms braced against the dome. With a surge of crimson chakra, he shattered the rock to rubble.
Ishiwa coughed blood, staggering. Still, he smiled faintly. With such a beast, Iwa will surely rise again.
But Yonbi wasn't done. "Die, human!"
He lunged, jaws wide.
Wu dove down, desperate to save his Tsuchikage.
"Prison bro, better not let the client die." Gin tapped Madara's shoulder.
Madara smirked. "With me here, Bijū are kittens."
He vanished, reappearing before Ishiwa. Sharingan blazing, he met Yonbi's gaze.
"Look into my eyes, beast."
Yonbi froze mid-charge, collapsing into instant slumber with a final whimper.
"See? Easy." Madara turned, cool as ice.
Ishiwa gawked. I nearly died, and he put it down with a glance…
Gin quickly waved his hands. "Disclaimer! This is my cousin's personal ability. Don't expect every Uchiha to do this."
The other Kage nodded, though their wary eyes lingered on Madara.
Back on his feet, humbled, Ishiwa sighed. "Hokage-dono, how exactly do you control a Bijū?"
Hashirama blinked. "Eh? I just… clap my hands and it works."
Gin coughed. "Why not ask Sunagakure? They've got experience with Shukaku."
Immediately, everyone turned to glare at Retto, the Wind Shadow.
"Ah—well… I only know they can be sealed," Retto stammered.
The word "sealing" sparked murmurs. Every village had some sealing jutsu, but true mastery was rare.
Ishiwa shot a look at Byakuren. "Your neighbors, the Uzumaki clan, are famous for sealing. Got connections?"
"Don't mention them!" Byakuren snapped, face darkening. Clearly, there was history there.
Ishiwa exhaled heavily, gazing at Yonbi. He understood: mastering these creatures would take time. But for now, he had to ensure peace.
"Fire Shadow. Iwa will sign your treaty."
"Eh?" Hashirama blinked. Was Madara secretly controlling him?
Byakuren followed. "Kiri will sign as well."
Raikage nodded cheerfully. "Kumo agrees."
All eyes turned to Retto.
"Sunagakure… could sign, but—"
"No buts!" Byakuren snapped.
"Yeah! Sign already!" Ishiwa barked.
Retto sputtered, nearly crying. "You're all bullying me!"
Gin sighed. Weak countries have no diplomacy. He brightened suddenly, flashing a grin at the group.
"Before we sign, let's settle accounts, eh? Special deal: first country to pay in full gets one free Bijū delivery service~"
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