By the time the first wisp struck, Also-Not-Wolfie was already gone. The dire wolf had noticed the slight change in body language, and jumped out of the way at the last moment. He looked up at the wisp floating toward him and spit out his rock. “Alright, that was just rude.”
“Quite rude,” agreed Wolfie as he fell into position next to his packmate. It had been too long since he had gotten to kill anything, and the dire wolf was looking forward to finding out how the wisps tasted. Wolfie had never been to the ocean, so he didn’t know what a jellyfish was. But the wisp’s dangling tentacles looked delicious.
The dire wolf threw his head back and howled, activating one of his paladin abilities.
—
Divine Conquest
Prerequisites: Celestial Sorcerer, Cleric, or Paladin
Cost: 1 Stress
Duration: 5 Minutes
The will of your god manifests on the battlefield, driving you and your allies toward victory. Magnitude and number of effects is determined by your tier. Your patron deity chooses the effects.
—
A giant glowing can of Rip-It energy drink appeared in the air above him. It burst into a shower of red, white, and blue, soaking the dire wolves. Wolfie licked his lips as the sweet liquid ran down his muzzle. He tapped his front paws on the ground in an attempt to contain the power coursing through his veins.
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You are under the effects of Haste.
+1 to Deflect and Attack
Resistance to Sleep.
Take 2 stress when the effect ends.
__
Also-Not-Wolfie called on his patron deity (who was still passed out on Not-Wolfie’s back) and let out a howl of his own.
__
Overwhelming Faith
Prerequisites: Celestial Sorcerer, Cleric, Monk, or Paladin
Cost: 1 Stress
Duration: 5 Minutes
Your faith in the divine neutralizes one hostile spell or ability effect per tier while this ability is active. Overwhelming Faith only neutralizes spells and abilities at or below your tier.
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“Now,” said Also-Not-Wolfie as the reassuring presence of Francis Francis Francis washed over the battlefield, “Let us prey.”
***
The wisps hated melee combat. As higher beings they were above such things, and loathed the idea of debasing themselves by engaging in physical violence. It probably also didn’t help that they were terrible at it. The wisps had spent all available points on increasing their psychic abilities as they leveled up, neglecting their physical stats in the process.
Normally this wasn’t a problem. Their victims were usually comatose by the time the wisps got around to sacrificing them to whatever lurked below the ruins. Slaughtering low-level forest creatures and racking up easy kills had been a dream come true for the wisps, but now they were finally going to have to earn their XP the hard way.
The first wisp tried to send a cloud of toxic spores toward the dire wolves, trying to choke them out. But Also-Not-Wolfie’s ability automatically nullified the poison. The other wisp tried to lash out at the cleric’s leg, only to see its attack bounce off harmlessly when Wolfie chose to sacrifice his own action to increase his packmate’s Deflect.
The two dire wolves were far from telepathic. But they didn’t need to be. The brain cell that they shared was telling them exactly what to do. They fell into a familiar rhythm of attacking and defending. When Wolfie moved in to take a bite out of a wisp, the other dire wolf boosted his Attack. Likewise, when one of the wisps tried to sting Also-Not-Wolfie, the cleric’s packmate was there to increase his Deflect.
Eventually one of the wisps got frustrated and tried to engulf Also-Not-Wolfie. It seemed to work at first, but then the wisp felt sharp teeth latch onto something delicate. “Oh excrement!” cursed the wisp as the dire wolf bit into the soft flesh at the base of one of his tentacles. The wisp tried to escape, but the cleric used his body weight to drag the creature back down to the ground.
The dire wolves had played it safe for long enough, now it was time to go in for the kill. Wolfie latched onto a tentacle of his own, and began to pull as hard as he could. Sour blood stung his lips (and mixed nicely with the lingering taste of Rip-It), but he ignored the danger. Taking the paladin class had made Wolfie resistant to most poisons.
“Help me!” shrieked the wisp as it felt its fragile body begin to tear, “I don’t want to die!”
The other wisp lashed out at Wolfie, trying to free its brother. But the dire wolf ignored the pain. Instead of letting go, Wolfie dug his teeth in even deeper. He could feel the slight give as the wisp’s body stretched to its breaking point. And it wouldn’t be long before—
There was a sound of flesh tearing, and the wisp let out a psychic wail as it was ripped in two. The dire wolves howled in triumph to celebrate their victory, then promptly collapsed. The poisoned blood they had accidentally ingested during the fight was finally starting to affect them, and not even the cleric’s special ability could protect them from their own stupidity.
“My… tongue… is numb,” mumbled Wolfie, as he became intimately acquainted with the difference between poison resistance, and immunity. Who could have guessed that gnawing on a giant psychic jellyfish would have ended so badly? Wolfie thought to himself.
“Yeah… mine’s numb too,” replied Also-Not-Wolfie, “I can’t move… everything… is tingly.”
“Ah… that’s… not good,” Wolfie said as the remaining wisp approached them. Its tentacles were twitching with malice. “I think… we might have… made it angry.”
“But… look at the… bright side,” gasped Also-Not-Wolfie, “At least… we finally get to see… some new colors.”
“Oh… wow…” Wolfie said as his mind was forcibly opened up to the wonders of the universe by a sub-lethal dose of jellyfish toxin. A kaleidoscope of unfamiliar colors and shapes swirled around him, pulsing and exploding like dying galaxies to the rhythm of his heartbeat. “It’s… so… beautiful… they should… have sent… a bard.”