She could no longer be with Rong Shaoze in good conscience, no longer be in love with him.
Rising to her feet, Lin Xinlan walked to the balcony and looked at the distant skyline, closing her eyes wearily.
Light footsteps sounded from behind her, and without turning around, she knew Rong Shaoze had come in.
The man walked up behind her, stopping just one step away, and didn’t move any closer.
He watched her, his gaze flickering, lips slightly pursed.
Lin Xinlan opened her eyes, said nothing, and did not turn around, as if she had no idea he was standing right behind her.
The two of them stood silently , with neither willing to break the silence.
Between them flowed an air of strangeness and confusion, yet all they could do was endure it helplessly.
Having stood like that for half an hour, Rong Shaoze finally turned and left the room.
As soon as he left, Lin Xinlan felt the room become even more empty, more lonely, and desolate.
Quite tacitly, they began to give each other the cold shoulder.
Neither spoke to the other, and even when they were in the same room, each did their own thing.
The intimacy of the past would not return to them.
The oppressive silence made it even harder to breathe.
Everyone noticed that something was off between them, thinking that eventually one would lose patience and speak first, but they both endured it well, neither saying a word.
Even Xiaocong realized that the two of them were unhappy with each other.
Climbing into Lin Xinlan’s lap, with his tiny arms wrapped around her neck, he opened his innocent eyes and asked, "Mommy, did you and Daddy have a fight?"
"Why would you say that?" Lin Xinlan asked with a slight smile.
The little guy looked down, thought for a moment, and said, "You and Daddy aren’t happy. You don’t talk or laugh. Is it because of that person you had a fight?"
A flash of shock crossed Lin Xinlan’s eyes.
She had not expected Xiaocong to be able to discern the reason behind her and Rong Shaoze’s silent treatment.
"What else does Xiaocong know?"
He blinked, and naively said, "I know that person really likes Daddy, but Daddy loves Mommy and doesn’t like her, so she threatened Daddy with Xiaocong, wanting Daddy to die with her. Daddy didn’t want to, and he hurt her, which made her really sad, and then she killed herself. But... Xiaocong hates her."
Lin Xinlan was astounded.
He had even understood all of that!
"Why do you hate her?" she asked instinctively, "Is it because she wanted to harm you?"
"Yeah, she wanted to hurt Xiaocong, so I hate her," Xiaocong nodded.
His head leaned against Lin Xinlan’s chest, and he whispered softly, "Also, she hated Mommy and wanted Daddy to leave Mommy, so Xiaocong hates her even more."
Lin Xinlan held her child, feeling a twinge of heartache.
"Xiaocong, were you scared by what happened that day?" She changed the subject, asking with concern.
Only now remembering to care for her child, she realized she was an incompetent mother.
Xiaocong lowered his head and bit his lip, shaking his head slightly.
Lin Xinlan stroked his head, disbelieving, "Really? You weren’t scared? I’m sorry, Mommy didn’t protect you, Mommy brought this upon you..."
At such a young age to have witnessed something so bloody, she truly hoped that his heart was not left with any shadows.
"Mommy." Xiaocong’s eyes suddenly reddened, he looked up at her plaintively and said, "Can we go home, please? Let’s go back to Grandma’s, Xiaocong wants to go home!"