The two were so close they could almost hear each other’s breath.
Shen Zhixian was stunned for a couple of seconds, motionless, silent.
She was very thin, and even though she wore a thick coat, he could easily encircle her waist from behind. Jiang Yanting rested his chin on her shoulder blade, his breath, unfailing, blowing into her neck...
His lowered voice was exceedingly magnetic, these words seemed to explode right beside her ear.
Her entire being, from the inside out, rapidly flushed with blood, her pretty face instantly turning bright red, she tucked in her neck, wishing she could bury herself in her scarf.
Just as she was about to struggle, she heard someone coming downstairs, and since it was a neighbor, whom they inevitably encountered entering or exiting, the voice was familiar, and she struggled even harder.
"If you move again, I can’t guarantee what I might do to you in front of your neighbor, can I?"
Shen Zhixian listened as the footsteps drew closer, not daring to make any significant movements.
And the neighbor, clearly seeing two people embraced in the stairwell’s inner corner, could only see Jiang Yanting from the back, with Shen Zhixian in his arms, seeing nothing else. The neighbor, feeling embarrassed, quickly left.
Only then did Shen Zhixian break free from his hold, turned to face him with surging emotions inside but still feigned calm on her face, "You came so early, is something the matter?"
"I told you, I’m taking you to meet someone."
"Actually..." Shen Zhixian bit her lip, "I think I’ve pretty much heard it all from Xie Duo, and I don’t think we’re suitable."
"That’s all in the past, now we both have our own lives, and actually, it’s quite good this way."
"Let’s not disturb each other anymore."
Jiang Yanting looked at her, "Do you still like me?"
"To be moved, that stuff is just hormones playing tricks, even if I liked you in the past, this state couldn’t possibly last for so many years, besides..."
Shen Zhixian didn’t finish speaking when Jiang Yanting stepped forward, cupped her face, and viciously kissed her.
As if something had exploded in an instant, it left a void.
But no matter how she struggled, she couldn’t shake him, until, with determination, she viciously bit him, tasting the metallic flavor of blood, and he still didn’t let go.
"Shen Zhixian, look into my eyes and repeat what you just said!"
His fingers were tightly gripping her shoulders, the force so great it was even painful.
Shen Zhixian was also pushed to the brink, and with an unexpected burst of strength, she pushed him away, "Jiang Yanting, you were at the hospital that day too, don’t you know what disease I got? I won’t be able to have children anymore!"
"You’ve already had a child for me..."
His words were cut short.
"He’s long gone!" Her voice was soft, as if she was talking about something insignificant, "Gone, from the moment he was born, I couldn’t save him..."
She gave him an easy smile, which was enough to wrench Jiang Yanting’s heart.
"I only glanced at him in a hurry, all wrinkled and actually quite ugly. No matter how much they spanked him at birth, he didn’t cry, and I hadn’t expected that we’d still lose him in the end."
"I never even heard his voice!"
"I feel so useless; having a baby nearly killed me, and then I couldn’t even save the child. I don’t know how to face you."
"Seeing you always brings back the past, and the pain stirs up in me, I simply can’t sleep..." Shen Zhixian placed a hand over her heart, "I can’t cope, do you understand?"
Jiang Yanting said nothing, just pulled her into his embrace, but this time she didn’t struggle, only let out a quiet laugh.
"Even if I do like you, I can’t face you..."
"You have your own child now. No child hopes for their father to find them a stepmother; I can’t face him either."
"Let’s both live well and let each other go."
Initially, Shen Zhixian thought that speaking about such a matter might be earth-shattering, but she hadn’t expected to inform him in such a calm tone, the weight lifted from her chest, giving her some relief.
But Jiang Yanting could hear the despair and helplessness behind each word after the grief.
So each word she said felt like a thousand pounds, pressing hard on his chest, making it difficult for him to breathe and leaving him to choke out:
"Is the child... really gone?"
Shen Zhixian laughed bitterly as she broke free from his embrace.
"I’m sorry, back then I..."
"Forget it, that’s all in the past."
"Who told you the child was gone?"