"What made you ask about Orc children? Just curious, or..?"
Renna was the one to ask that, the red head staring at me curiously as she watched me tap the edges of the ingots they had both prepared for me, her question pulling me from my thoughts and forcing me to focus on her and Shelur once more.
"Remember how I was able to 'give' you some 'skills' that got us into this current position?"
I answered her question with my own question, confusing the Duchess for but a moment as she and Shelur exchanged a glance, only for them both to nod and wait for me to continue on, listening closely to what I had to say.
"Well, the thing is that extends to all of my children... and I can give them skills that would improve their talents and potential in certain areas, which also seems to affect their thought processes and how they act after they are born... Something that you could argue is a boon or a bane to this ability of mine. It gives them purpose and an idea on what they want to do, but..."
"It feels like it is forced onto them because they are good at a certain thing? Well... do you know how many people would kill to know what they are adept at doing naturally? It would make life so much easier if you knew right at the start what you were talented in..."
Renna gave me a small smile after that, while Shelur just shrugged and said "Orc's already have that, so if you were giving our child skills that revolve around being a fighter, that's fine. It'll just push their talent to a new level."
I nodded, those four skills I had already chosen feeling even more comfortable now that Shelur agreed with me, but as for that last skill and the dilemma I was facing...
"So if I said I had a skill that I had acquired after I... well... after I had killed someone, someone that I hated... and it revolves around killing, specifically those that I hate... It just makes me stronger when fighting mortals, and even stronger against people I, again, hate, but..."
"You want to know if an Orc would be insane and out of control if they had this... 'skill' that revolves around killing? If she would be bloodthirsty and crazy? Hateful? Maybe she would be more inclined to act on her anger, or maybe she wouldn't. You won't know till it is given to someone, now would you?"
Shelur's words gave me a reason to pause for a second, and I stared at her in shock as I realized that there was a way to test this... there was a way to test the way [Killer] would interact with someone, and specifically with an Orc.
The Orc in question also seemed to catch on to what I was thinking as she looked at Renna before returning her emerald gaze to me, pursing her lips for a moment before asking "You want to give me this skill, don't you? To see what it does to someone's psyche?"
"Astra... are you certain that this is a good idea? Is there not a safer skill you could give this child? One that would not influence it to potentially be crazed?"
Renna's voice of reason made me pause, the doubt inside me returning as I gave her a nod, confirming her suspicions that there was another skill I could give that was less risky, but after seeing that Shelur asked "If you had to compare the two, how much stronger is this riskier skill?"
"Well... I don't know. The less riskier skill would just make them stronger, but the riskier one... I don't know. Perhaps it would alter her mentality? I just don't really know what it would do, but I do know that it is stronger than the other skill; I can feel that."
"Is that not even more reason to not risk it? If you have no idea what it will do? Because even if you give it to Shelur, you cannot confidently say you understand what it does and how it will influence a child over a fully grown adult!"
That made me pause again, and this time Shelur nodded in agreement, though it seemed she still wanted to take the risk just to see... but by this point, I was convinced that it wasn't worth the risk, that it would be better to-
I froze as I realized where my mind was going; I was thinking it would be better to just let someone random knock me up and give skills to their child to see what would happen, and instantly, as soon as I realized I was thinking like that, I felt disgusted with myself.
Was I treating my children like an extension of their Dama's?
Was I alright with some random person having sex with me once, unaware that they had planted their seed inside me and therefor not having an obligation to remain close to me at all, which would then leave their child to simply be my own and only mine?
Therefor I was 'allowed' to 'do whatever I wanted' with them?
Biting my cheek, I took a deep breath and cast the thoughts from my mind, not wanting to deal with them right now as I instead said "I'll just go with the safer one... I don't think the risk is worth it, not now anyways."
Shelur gave me a nod before glancing at Renna, who had a relieved smile as she looked between the two of us, the red head clearly happy with the decision to not potentially manipulate this child in my womb to being something potentially terrible right away.
"So... are you going to need us to leave when you begin forging, or..?"
My attention was drawn back to the ingots, and I stared at them for a moment, wondering what I was supposed to do with them before remembering the real reason we were here, which made me smile wryly as I realized how easily swept away my attention was.
"You can stay and watch if you want. If you do, sit over there; I'll need all of this area here to work comfortably, and if you are near it, you might either be in the way or get showered with the sparks."