Violet danced her part perfectly on opening night but her insides twisted every time she caught sight of the VIP rows because Noah's seat was empty. He had never missed an opening night before.
She didn't blame him at all; she knew he was still down in V.i.r.g.i.nia with the rest of his family. But it felt wrong. Nobody had come to see her because Jeremy said he would come to the last performance before Christmas.
Oliver dragged Kaleb along with him to the matinee the day after but it wasn't the same. There were five performances total that weekend and at least one person she knew came to the rest of them but it didn't make her feel any better.
On Monday she showed up at Noah's dojo unannounced for the first time in a while and all of the little kids in the class he was teaching swarmed her excitedly. "Miss Violet! Miss Violet!"
"I missed you very much," one of the little boys confided with a shy smile.
She couldn't help but smile in return. "I missed you guys too. Sorry I've been busy lately."
Noah seemed absolutely exhausted, though his katas were as flawless as ever when she walked in. He frowned slightly when he saw her.
"What are you doing here?"
The question stung. It used to be as natural as breathing to show up at each other's jobs without warning. Why was he asking her that with such an expression on his face now?
"I missed you," Violet said lightly. "You're a hard person to get a hold of these days."
His gaze was unfathomable. "Sorry about that. I've had a lot going on."
The silence between them was deafening. What was going on? Things with Noah were never like this! Violet wanted to ask him what was going on with him but she felt so stifled by the awkwardness in the room that she was more tempted to flee.
"Sorry for bothering you then," she said thickly around the lump in her throat. She could not cry. Not here, when he was acting so weird.
Hurrying out the door with hasty goodbyes to everyone present, she barely managed to hold back her tears. That whole interaction felt wrong! Violet ended up curling up under the covers with a romance novel she couldn't concentrate on and her cats until it was time to go to rehearsal.
===
Her poor mood remained throughout the beginning of December even though her shows were going well and Jeremy took her to do a bunch of fun Christmassy dates. They went ice skating at the Rockefeller Center, to see the holiday window displays downtown, and to a concert on one of her nights off.
Violet needed to snap out of it and be a good date. This was the sort of Christmastime romance she had always wanted after watching all of those cheesy Hallmark films her mother hated over the years.
Right now they were riding in a horse-drawn carriage through Central Park. She had always wanted to do this but never had a boyfriend this time of year. She huddled under the blanket they provided for warmth and gazed at the lights hung throughout the park.
"I've always loved Christmas lights," she remarked casually, breaking the silence that had pervaded since they got in the carriage.
Jeremy was a good conversationalist but today it seemed like she wasn't the only one with something on her mind. He had hardly spoken a word since they got here.
"I'm glad you get to enjoy more of them then," he said before clearing his throat and continuing a bit nervously. "Violet…the past couple of months with you have been some of the best of my life. I would like to keep seeing you in a more official capacity. Will you be my girlfriend?"
Violet turned toward him and her mind went blank for a moment. Really, she should have seen this coming. They had been practically attached at the hip for over a month now. And she did like him. There was no reason to freeze up like this.
Recovering her wits about her, she smiled. "I would love to."
Jeremy smiled softly before leaning forward to kiss her. It was a perfect, romantic moment…and she was still feeling the same gloom as earlier. What was wrong with her?
When Violet got home at the end of the date she posted a picture on Instagram of them in the carriage with a simple heart emoji as the caption. Jeremy had social media accounts but never used them so there was no point trying to get him to change his relationship status online. This picture would suffice for people to know she had a boyfriend.
Violet vaguely entertained the idea of texting Noah about it before deciding against it. She hadn't dared try to contact him again after that awkward day in the dojo. He hadn't reached out to her either.
The angry, indignant part of her tried to tell herself things like 'who needs him anyway!' but they were empty words. Not talking to or seeing her best friend of twenty-four years felt wrong. She didn't know why he seemed to be mad at her either.
What had she done? She couldn't think of anything she said that would be offensive.
Maybe Noah had finally gotten sick of her clinginess like she used to worry about when all the drama went down with Kaleb. But he had promised he didn't think she was clingy. So why was he avoiding her?
Violet hated this. She should be happy that she was finally dating again; she shouldn't be this hung up on how weird her best friend had been acting lately. If they were even still best friends at all. The thought that they might not be threatened to crush her.
Noah had been there her entire life. He was as important to her as any of her family members. She couldn't afford to lose him. But what was she supposed to do when he had already been avoiding her texts before she ran out on him?
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