Perhaps, it wasn’t fair to He Teng, and it still fell short of what she was hoping for.
If in the beginning, she had fallen in love with He Teng with a tinge of regret and intent to atone, then now, He Zhilan’s love for He Teng was pure without a trace of other emotions. Pure love, love for He Teng the man, and love for this man who hadn’t fallen in love with her.
Once a person falls in love, isn’t it natural to be greedy?
Love can’t bear the slightest impurity.
She started hoping, that He Teng would look at her with the gaze of a lover, just like she did at him.
She didn’t ask for much, just a little more of irresistible tenderness compared to now.
"Brother, you can’t deny that when we got married, it was all the same to you whom you married. I was simply the wife assigned to you by dad since we were children. You married the status of a wife, not the person who is the wife," He Zhilan choked out. "At that time, you were not in love, and neither was I, right?"
He Teng nodded. Even he himself didn’t fully understand what He Zhilan was trying to say, but he did understand this much — He Zhilan insisted on divorce when he said he wouldn’t divorce.
After a while, he agreed, "Okay. I will handle the procedures as soon as possible after returning to the army."
"Don’t let our Dad know." He Teng’s immediate agreement didn’t surprise He Zhilan.
But actually, if at this point He Teng was as assertive as usual in the army, He Zhilan wouldn’t have insisted on the divorce. But now, He Teng unusually did not have the persistence he had when he proposed for divorce.
He Teng mechanically nodded. Seeing that He Zhilan had no intention of speaking more, he proposed to return to the military base.
"Alright, I’ll stay here, you can be at ease. Lin Chan and others are all here, be careful out there on your missions, don’t go out well and return to me injured."
He Teng didn’t say anything, he quietly looked at He Zhilan for a few seconds, her eyes slightly red, and eventually, he turned around and left the ward.
Once He Teng left, He Zhilan couldn’t contain her tears.
"Zhilan, looking at the way He Teng left, has he misunderstood something?" Jiang Biyun looked anxiously from the already departed He Teng to He Zhilan on the sickbed.
"I know, he’s intellectually smart but emotionally dumb. I said so much, yet he agreed too readily." On this point, He Zhilan knew that He Teng must have thought she insisted on divorce because she no longer wanted to maintain the marriage.
"You knew this and you still let him leave just like that?" Jiang Biyun was shocked.
"A divorce doesn’t mean the end for us, it’s not necessarily a bad thing. At least, without the marriage, when I tell him I love him again, he won’t doubt whether I am trying to deceive him. Some things, once freed from the constraints of marriage, mean something different."
The sequence of their love story wasn’t right in the first place. He Teng didn’t trust her. Even if they made up today, He Teng would inevitably have doubts about her in the future. That would be too exhausting for both of them.
She would have to carefully avoid making He Teng doubt her, and carefully mend the crack that had already appeared in their relationship.
And He Teng, he would always be overthinking, wondering if even the affection in her eyes was all an act.
Everyone understood that although He Zhilan was the one who insisted on the divorce, it didn’t mean the end of He Zhilan and He Teng’s relationship. On the contrary, He Zhilan wanted to use the divorce to reset their relationship and start all over again.