The door's dry click into place told me that the King and I were once again alone together in the Council Chambers. I could hear my heartbeat in my ears, while simultaneously feeling the blood rush from my face. How is that even possible?
"Please take a seat," King Caderyn offered, tearing me from my thoughts.
The King motioned to the same seat where I received my first talking down. Could life really be that cruel to have history repeat itself this close together? I took up the seat but remained silent. If he wanted to continue where he left off, I wouldn't interrupt him.
"Sir Jacobson, our last encounter was probably," he paused to find the right word. "Unpleasant for you."
That was an understatement. That conversation has been haunting me for days. Although my lips stayed pressed tight, my eyes betrayed my feelings about his use of that word. I did not quite roll my eyes, but I might as well have.
"You're right. That conversation was dreadful and I'm sure it was hard for you to hear," The King admitted. Where was he going with this?
"I am sad to say that this conversation will be harder on me," King Caderyn straightened to his full height. I steeled myself with a deep breath, unsure of what was next.
"I apologize. I realize my own frustrations and emotions were taken out on you without cause. Although it is no excuse for my behavior, I hope you might understand how seeing my own death might put me out of sorts," The conviction in the king's voice stayed strong.
I no longer pinched my lips tightly to each other. At some point my jaw hung slack. My deep breath rolled out of my lungs as if I had been gut punched. At least I no longer had to worry about inadvertently escalating the situation with unfiltered thoughts since I was stunned into silence. The King of Ensis just apologized to me.
"I am a man with a temper. It is not something I am proud of, but it is part of me. I said things that were cruel and untrue. You have been a loyal citizen and devout friend to my daughter. Thank you for the role you've played in keeping her safe," my counterpart's sincerity rolled from his lips naturally. How could this man be the same one who berated me a few days ago?
"Although my apology pales in comparison to my grievances, please know that I hope to learn from my mistakes. These days without you in Swordsmen Meetings have been very eye opening." Although King Caderyn did not elaborate, I wanted to know more about what happened without me.
My mind raced for a moment. Did Queen Valerie run all of them? I wonder if King Caderyn was reminded of me every time she came into this room. Did the Swordsmen bring up my name? That would be embarrassing for King Caderyn. How did the King come to such a change of heart? It couldn't have been easy.
I realized that the King was staring at me, hoping for some type of response. He exuded an anxiousness that I had never seen before. It was as if he expected me to reject his apology and storm off. I wonder if that is how the man before me acquired such a temper. Rejection is a powerful motivator.
"You are forgiven, Your Majesty," I said strongly. I believed him. It is hard to humble yourself and truly mean it. I think this was the side of King Caderyn that made Queen Valerie pick him as her husband. Relief reached the corners of the King's pinched expression, but did not quite reach his eyes.
"Thank you, Sir Jacobson. Unfortunately I need to broach one more uncomfortable topic with you," King Caderyn shifted uncomfortably while trying to keep some semblance of regal rigidity.
What could make his somewhat pompous man more uncomfortable than having to apologize to a child? I fidgeted nervously, not liking the ridiculous answers that flashed through my head.
"In regards to Princess Alina. I took to heart what you said about her not breaking your engagement just to save my life. If my fate is the only reason forcing both of you into matrimony, then I will not allow it!" The king cleared his throat, holding back emotions that I could not fully understand. The bond between a father and his daughter was not one easily understood by those outside of the relationship.
"Please take this time away from the palace to find out what you both want. Preferably without telling my daughter that I'm interfering with her life yet again. This needs to be her choice. And yours as well." I was added to his thoughts as a footnote. He really wanted to know Alina's decision on the matter.
" If you both want to break the engagement, please let me be the one to take the blame publicly. I did, after all, get you both into this mess," a heavy sigh ended the King's speech.
"I will do as you say, Your Majesty," I announced. "Thank you."
Lately I had only considered my emotions toward my marriage, and not Alina's. What if she wanted to go through with it? I had already had time to accept that part of King Caderyn's tirade. I had written myself off as a bachelor and no longer a fiancé. Although I am grateful for my King's change of heart, it did complicate my emotions yet again.
"Sir Jacobson, are you alright?" King Caderyn interrupted my thoughts yet again.
I sucked in a breath. While getting lost in my thoughts I forgot to breathe. I'm sure I was turning pale. "Yes, Your Majesty."
"Shall we join the rest for dinner?" King Caderyn smiled warmly as he stood to leave.
"That would be lovely," I responded. Somehow standing up to follow him put the weight of my decisions today on my shoulders. I was ready for today to end