Her comment seemed so funny to me that I couldn't help joining her laughter with a genuine infantile gurgle.
While enjoying these intimate moments with my mother, my mind wandered to deeper reflections. I thought about my previous life, an existence that now seemed blurry and distant, about my death, and about that nebulous limbo from which I couldn't escape.
At the beginning of this new life, I had suspected it might be some kind of divine punishment. However, I quickly understood that I was wrong.
Despite not fully understanding my situation — where I was, why I was here, who had brought me — I felt deep gratitude.
This wasn't punishment, but an incomprehensible and wonderful act of grace. For some reason I couldn't comprehend, I had been given back what I had so carelessly wasted in my previous life.
Without tangible evidence to support it, I firmly believed this was a precious gift. My previous name had vanished into oblivion, but now I had a new one, Arceus, and with it, the opportunity for a new beginning, free from the weight of my past, my mistakes, and my guilt.
This small body, which at first felt alien and strange, now seemed to fit perfectly, as if it had always been destined to be mine. The feeling was so overwhelming that I couldn't contain my emotions.
—Ah... Ah...
I tried to articulate something, anything, while tears began to spring forth. I didn't care about crying; I forced my immature vocal cords to make some sound that could express the intensity of what I was feeling.
At that moment, I made myself a solemn promise: this time, I would do things right. While my mother rocked me in her arms, my determination burned intensely.
Although many things still didn't make sense — why I had been born here, what my purpose was in this new world — I knew I would have enough time to discover it all.
I had had enough of remaining stagnant, of yielding to adversity, of hugging my knees in defeat. I didn't care if I failed or stumbled along the way. I didn't care how many obstacles I had to face.
This time...
This time would be different. I would live fully, make the most of every moment in this world!
I expressed my resolution with the only means I had available: a cry that only a baby could produce, a mixture of joy, determination, and a touch of fear before the unknown.
Adelaide, perceiving the intensity of my emotions although not understanding their true nature, held me tighter against her chest, whispering words of comfort and love.
—It's okay, my love
She murmured while gently caressing my back.
—Mommy is here. I'll always be here for you.
I clung to her, letting my tears flow freely. In that embrace, I felt how all the fears and doubts I had accumulated since my rebirth gradually dissolved.
As I calmed down, I began to perceive my surroundings with new clarity. Colors seemed more vivid, sounds sharper, and every detail of the world around me took on deeper meaning.
While Adelaide gently rocked me, humming a lullaby that I already recognized as my favorite, I felt a wave of peace completely invade me.
My eyelids became heavy, and although I fought to keep my eyes open, not wanting to miss even a second of this new reality, sleep was relentless.
Before succumbing completely to drowsiness, I had one last conscious thought: "Thank you."
I didn't know exactly to whom or what I was directing my gratitude.
Perhaps to the universe, perhaps to some higher power, or maybe simply to life itself for this second chance.
With a small smile on my lips, I finally surrendered to sleep, safe in my mother's arms and full of hope for the future that awaited me.
This time, this time I was going to do it right.