"Wife, you’re so wonderful. Marrying you is my greatest fortune in my three lifetimes!" Lu Jiang lovingly held his wife’s hand, articulating his feelings.
"Alright, go wash up and get some sleep. We’ve been tired these past few days, and tomorrow is their wedding ceremony. We both need to attend."
"Oh? The wedding is tomorrow? Who’s getting married first?"
Qingxue smiled and replied, "Everyone’s getting married. Chen of the army staff is presiding over the ceremony tomorrow noon. All four couples I introduced, as well as the partners that the military arranged, will host their weddings tomorrow."
Lu Jiang’s face lit up in surprise, "A mass wedding eh!"
"Yes! You should rest quickly."
With his wife and son by his side, without the wild wind of the frontier, or the hardship of weathering the elements, Lu Jiang slept deeply. He woke up to a pungent smell and could barely breathe.
He forced his eyes open and saw Xibao’s chubby butt.
At this moment, Xibao was sitting on his face.
"No wonder I couldn’t breathe. No wonder there is such a strong smell of urine. Xibao must have wet his diaper that’s wrapped around his butt during the night." Lu Jiang thought groggily. Not wanting to be disturbed from his restful morning, he nonchalantly pushed Xibao to the side. Noticing that his wife was still deep in sleep, he refrained from chastising Xibao, and closed his eyes to pretend to sleep.
Xibao rolled to one side, then quickly climbed back and sat on same spot, treating his father’s face as a stool.
Lu Jiang was almost infuriated to death. He prodded Xibao’s chubby butt.
"No! No!" Xibao, clad in a cotton onesie, was nimble. He easily batted away the hand that was poking his butt. Then, he climbed over to Qingxue, patting her face, "Mommy, Mommy!"
Qingxue was awakened by the noise, but didn’t want to open her eyes.
His dad is here, Qingxue thought.
Seeing that his mother didn’t open her eyes, the little fatty got anxious. He continued to gently pat her face, then clambered onto Qingxue, almost squashing her, "Mommy, Mommy!"
Qingxue reluctantly opened her groggy eyes, "Xibao, why are you up so early? How about sleeping with mommy for a while longer?"
"Stinky! Stinky!" Xibao pointed to his butt, "Poopy! Poopy! Poopy!"
"You pooed?" Qingxue immediately sat up, instantly wide awake.
Lu Jiang was home, so she had put a diaper on Xibao instead of pee pants.
Lu Jiang also quickly sat up, turned pale in anger, pointing to Xibao and snapping, "Lu Xibao, did you just poop on my face?" No wonder he smelled something foul later on!
Qingxue was taken aback. So that’s what happened when she was still asleep!
Pooping on Lu Jiang’s face, the thought of the scene was absolutely hilarious. Qingxue could not hold her laughter, laughing so hard that she was in tears.
Xibao stood on the bed, barefoot and tilting his head, his innocent big eyes blinking, and his chubby fists tapping against each other.
"Mommy?" His chubby toes curled a little.
Once Qingxue was done with her laughter, she nudged Lu Jiang’s leg with her foot, "That’s your son. What’s there to be disgusted about? As they say, a child’s urine is considered precious, and a child’s poop is gold! Now go clean up your son’s butt. We’re not wearing diapers during the day."
Lu Jiang pointed at Xibao, "You win, you win, Lu Xibao, you just wait and see!"
Resigned, he got out of bed to fetch water and a towel. He then waited on his little ’master’, cleaning his butt and dressing him up for the day.
After removing the soiled diaper, it wasn’t over yet. It had to be washed, cleaned thoroughly, and then dried by the stove.
.. Seeking votes as per routine