Ah, why did I have to act like that? It’s not like he was trying to get rid of me, he just thinks I need someone better to hunt with, which maybe isn’t wrong, but… Auhg.
“Um, Thera, is everything okay?” Steph asked her while they kept watch together. The first two nights they’d been able to make a small amount of chitchat at least, but on this one she was completely silent and absorbed in her thoughts.
Thera’s first instinct was to just lie and say everything was fine, but she didn’t end up getting a wink of sleep after how she’d been feeling and she did want to talk about it. Since Sonya wasn’t around and the person she’d normally talk to about her issues was the one she was fighting with, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to open up to her just a little.
“I had a fight with Ben,” She admitted, feeling awkward as she did.
“Oh no, what happened?”
“It’s dumb, he tried to talk to me about finding a real party to hunt with and I reacted badly.”
“He is a craftsman,” Steph said, trying to be careful with her words. “Mind telling me how you both ended up hunting together to begin with?”
She’d gotten the abridged version of the story in Ben’s letters but was curious about the finer details that she’d previously missed. Thera was agreeable at least and began awkwardly recounting the tale of how they started working together, both of them being forced into it from by her uncle, his annoying way of trying to form a friendship while she just wanted to keep her distance, what they both went through dealing first with Roan, then everything her mother set up in Anailia.
When she looked back on it, she couldn’t help but think that despite all the insanity they’d been through, it had been a fun year, maybe one of the most enjoyable she’d had. Even when considering that she’d faced death from both a madman and a god's trial, it was still better than the monotony that life previously held for her.
Reminiscing like that brought a faint smile to her lips, hidden by her hood, but Steph seemed to take away something different from Thera’s story.
“That idiot,” She fumed, keeping herself from yelling it out for the sake of those sleeping. “In not a single letter did he tell us how many times he’s apparently almost died.”
“Ah, I’m sure he probably just didn’t want to worry you,” Thera was quick to say, realizing that she might have revealed more than she should have.
“Mmh, I’ll be talking to him about that later. But anyway, aren’t you just worried about losing him?”
Her silence spoke volumes, making Steph want to dig deeper. She wanted the chance to grow closer with Thera after all, not to mention satisfying her own curiosity.
“So about the whole marriage thing-”
“What's that have to do with anything?”
“Just humor me,” Steph told her. “Let's say you can’t cancel the engagement, your mom sounds crafty, maybe she’ll be able to force the issue. How do you think you’d feel if you had to marry Ben?”
Thera thought for a moment. She hadn’t even considered the prospect that her mother might try to force things more than she already had, but it was more possible than she’d like to admit. As for how she would feel…
“Sad. I think it would make me sad.”
It wasn’t the answer Steph had expected, nor remotely close to what she’d hoped for. She was aware of the same issue that Will had spoken of to Ben. With the number of humans on the planet and the fact that they could expect some to die in the war if it came sooner than later, Ben might end up alone on top of being the only one without any sort of backing. She had hoped that the care Thera seemed to have for him might lean toward the romantic end so that he wouldn’t have to go through that and could potentially get some of the benefits he’d been denied due to the skills he’d arrived with, but maybe that wasn’t to be. Still, she wanted to probe further, especially after an answer like that.
“Isn’t that a bit extreme? I know he can be a bit obsessive when he starts a task, and pretty willing to ignore a personal bubble, but I’m sure you must see what a nice guy he is?”
“It’s not about that,” She said with a shake of her head. “He’s already aware of this, but as a halfbreed I can expect an unusually long life. I’ve never wanted to get married because the idea of watching someone I care about slowly die like that sounds terrible.”
Steph was momentarily silenced. She hadn’t expected such a depressing reason and it took a bit to know what to say.
“In that case, what about if Ben marries someone else, are you going to be alright with that?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” She asked in confusion.
“There are plenty of times when people enter a relationship with someone else that they have less time for other people they care about. It’s not something anyone ever really means to happen, but it can happen.”
Thera froze. She didn’t have any real friends growing up and had dismissed the idea of romance when she was old enough to understand what that would mean for her, so she didn’t have any experience losing a friend she cared about to it.
“Did that happen for you and Will?” She suddenly asked, wanting more information and making Steph blush in the process.
“Ah, um, what do you mean?”
“Oh sorry, I guess I assumed from what I saw when Ben connected us. Do humans normally do that sort of thing with people they’re just friends with?”
It seemed like something that would normally be extremely private for a lot of races and had left her blushing under her hood for a while after it happened. If humans just act like that together with anyone they care about then does that mean Ben would want to and only hasn’t out of respect for cultural differences? So would he want some time alone with Steph to…
Just the thought left her flushed all over again, but Steph was at least quick to correct her.
“No!” She yelled a bit louder than intended. “Ahem, I mean, yeah me and Will are together, we don’t just do that sort of thing with anyone so don’t think anything weird. As for us, well most of the people we care about are on a whole other world. I send letters to a couple other classmates and so does Will, but it’s not really the same.”
‘Oh good,” Thera said, strangely relieved to hear it. Wait, relieved? Why should I feel so-
“Back to the matter at hand, I just think you should clear things up by telling him how you feel. If you want to keep hunting with him tell him that and tell him why.”
“Mmh, I know you’re right, but I made a scene about it and it’s going to be so awkward…”
“I’m sure it will be fine, I bet Ben is just as anxious,” Steph told her confidently. “Besides, nothing will get better if neither of you say anything.”
“Alright, I’ll talk to him in the morning… Thanks.”
Steph smiled as Thera sat with her thoughts and both were content to enjoy their peace for the rest of the night, right up until the ground around them exploded.