"Husband, I’m sorry, I must have been crazy to ask you that..." An Jing sobbed, still deeply mired in self-blame.
With her face covered in sweat-soaked hair, Xiao Changyi didn’t speak, merely brushed all her hair behind her ears before gently kissing her still damp eyes, wordlessly comforting her.
An Jing instinctively closed her eyes, the warm touch on her eyelids and the hot breath he spilled on her face both pained her heart deeply.
"Don’t ever ask that again, I detest this question." Xiao Changyi expressed his stance with extreme candor and clarity, his voice a thousand, no, ten-thousand times more severe than usual.
An Jing’s husband had never treated her with such severity, but she wasn’t angry at all. Instead, she felt much better, nodding vigorously, "Mhm! I won’t ask again! I won’t even mention it!"
With that, she burrowed into his embrace.
Xiao Changyi didn’t say anything, just held her tightly – as tightly as possible, as if trying to embed her into his body, merge her into his bones and blood.
If this man didn’t want her anymore, he would end his life. This wasn’t a joke, but the truth.
Feeling the strength her husband applied to her body, An Jing didn’t say anything, just held on to her husband tightly, ever tighter, as much as she could.
In the end, it was Xiao Changyi who broke the silence.
After gently kissing the top of An Jing’s head, he spoke softly, "I’ve promised Uncle Liu, no matter what, I would never end my life."
When Old Hunter Liu was still alive, he had wanted to die and once tried to end his life stealthily, but was caught by Old Hunter Liu in the act.
Back then, only Old Hunter Liu could offer him a glimmer of warmth. When Old Hunter Liu begged him tearfully to never take his own life, even though he still felt that being alive was worse than dead, he agreed.
Therefore, ever since, even when he wanted to die, he wished for someone else to end his life, never by his own hand.
If she didn’t want him, he wouldn’t mind breaking that promise.
If there ever came a day when he felt the person he thought would never leave him did abandon him... aside from suicide, from leaving this world, he couldn’t see any other path left for him.
Upon hearing Xiao Changyi’s words, even without asking for details, An Jing could guess that Xiao Changyi had once attempted to end his life while Old Hunter Liu was alive. Otherwise, why would he have made that promise to Old Hunter Liu in the first place?
Her heart clenched tightly, aching sharply.
She had once been puzzled why, instead of choosing suicide, he wanted to die by someone else’s hand – yet somehow he could never achieve it... Now, she understood completely.
"Husband." An Jing sniffled, wriggled out from Xiao Changyi’s arms, got up, and faced Xiao Changyi. Then, smiling at Xiao Changyi, she said, "I love you."
"Mhm." After a pause, "I love you too."
An Jing lowered her head, pressing her lips to his, and after exchanging a gentle kiss, she added, "No one can separate us, not even ourselves."
Finally, a softness crested in Xiao Changyi’s cool gaze, "Mhm."